Funniest Complaints Amazing Race Canada 5 Episode 6

Too many complaints in our nation’s capital. Surprisingly few about a horse’s anus being broadcast on TV.

canada complaints 6 1

No. No more Ontario. Sudbury, Hamilton, and Kingston have made Ontario the most vanilla province to film each season. You guys had three chances and fucking blew it each time. And now Ottawa and Toronto are both overused.

canada complaints 6 2

I don’t want to associate Julie and Lowell with “oozes”. That’s an image I won’t get out of my head.

canada complaints 6 3

Yeah, it’s so rigged that they have to have anywhere between two to four NELs each season depending on the number of legs and teams at the start of the game.

canada complaints 6 4

Man. Those fifteen minutes went by fast.

japan eric lisa 9

That’s like Eric & Lisa quick.

canada complaints 6 5

Celine Dion wrote a song that I do not listen to nor know its lyrics?

celine dion

That sounds about right.

canada complaints 6 6

rodney lavoie

Yes. Yes we did.

canada complaints 6 7

O/H? That’s the dumbest abbreviation since. . .since GTFYS.

And bad NEL format?

linda weaver 9

“ARE YOU SORRY YOU WASTED YOUR U-TURN? YOU WILL BEEEEE.

canada complaints 6 8

ken ryan

Isn’t that what happened?

canada complaints 6 9

emperor palpatine

Gooooooood.

canada complaints 6 10

Too bad I don’t have a driver’s license.

canada complaints 6 11

Well, if TAR Canada won’t go out of their way to do an ad for you, I guess you have to screencap it and tweet it yourself.

canada complaints 6 12

I did because I AM A FUCKING CANADIAN! IF YOU DON’T PASS THIS TEST THEN YOU ARE AN UNPATRIOTIC ASSHOLE WHO SHOULD LEAVE OUR COUNTRY!

uncle sam

Uncle Justin says FUCK YOU!

canada complaints 6 13

Way to abuse a hashtag just to get attention, guys.

canada complaints 6 14

It would be the latest twist. Speed Bump, U-Turn Double Battle (NOT Face-Off), Deportation. . .

canada complaints 6 15

Why villainess?

dustin kandice 2

You just want Dustin & Kandice again, eh?

canada complaints 6 16

Very high when they stalk RFF and the majority of the race takes place in your home country. Oh, and locals know hours in advance where the U-Turn board is going to be.

canada complaints 6 17

I don’t think Jim Watson thought it was interesting enough to tell anyone. He probably forgot about it until you started tweeting him.

jim watson

I thought I was on Master Chef.

canada complaints 6 18

What the fuck are you talking about?

canada complaints 6 20

Did you? Did you really? Best TV moment in a while? My favourite moment is watching Michael of Liz & Michael running up and down steps for two hours in the mountains of Greece.

canada complaints 6 21

canada complaints 7 29

Those are two things you’re going to regret in your day. It’s like eating a pile of horse crap followed by sleeping in your own puke.

canada complaints 6 22

Because we need Ebonie to motorboat more face masks.

canada complaints 6 24

This week is really taking the definition of the word “best” and rendering it meaningless.

canada complaints 6 25

I know. It makes Julie and Lowell ooze. . .with excitement.

See what I mean, Tom? You need to find an alternative word.

julie lowell

In fact, I think Lowell went blind partially because he oozed too much even before he met Julie.

canada complaints 6 26

I didn’t know constantly looking up RFF was a Canadian past time.

canada complaints 6 27

Next year teams have to park their Chevy Viper next to a stable where a dairy farmer accidentally shoved Canadian cheddar up a horse’s ass and teams are responsible for taking it out while singing a song by Celine Dion. Once it is done to the satisfaction of a RCMP officer, they will receive their next clue.

canada complaints 6 28

scantron.jpg

Yeah, he really used that SCANTRON machine well for those multiple choice tests!

canada complaints 6 29

Second, Holly. Second.

canada complaints 6 30

They probably found Chris Farley living in a van down by the river.

canada complaints 6 31

D-R-A-M-A. The end.

canada complaints 6 32

New York Yankees and North Korea are more popular in Canada than Amazing Race Canada.

derek jeter.jpg

And Derek Jeter isn’t even on the New York Yankees anymore.

.

.

.

Derek Jeter has been retired for three years? Damn, I feel old.

canada complaints 6 33

One. It’s an eleven leg format. Unless there’s a Final Two, then there is zero. Unless there is a Final Four, then there is two.

canada complaints 6 34

Well, at least one person other than me is happy that Andrea & Ebonie were saved again. Probably not for the same reasons, though.

canada complaints 6 35

*Unsubscribe from Sue’s Reality Canada*

canada complaints 6 36

Fuck you. You’re shameful for thinking that memorizing what Saskatchewan’s third greatest export is is what qualifies you to be a “proper” Canadian. Take the test yourself Dale then get back to me.

canada complaints 6 37

If it weren’t for the city of Las Vegas, all of us would have Celine Dion erased from our memory banks.

canada complaints 6 38

Wow. I just read “Celine Dion” and “good” in the same sentence.

canada complaints 6 39

Welcome to Canada.

canada complaints 6 40

I was about to comment on T. Lee’s complaint, but then I remembered how I didn’t care about Aneal.

suzette swear

And Suzette doesn’t want to put up with Aneal’s shit with his TARC commentary either.

canada complaints 6 41

Why is your tweet oddly hyphenated?

william shatner

Is William Shatner taking over your Twitter?

canada complaints 6 42

No, Canadian history is just that boring.

canada complaints 6 43

jay leno.jpg

Yeah, then every other question would be about Bill Clinton or Monica Lewinsky. I am not even kidding.

canada complaints 6 44

K.

canada complaints 6 45

What does that make their asses? Golden?

canada complaints 6 46

The translator tried.

canada complaints 6 47

You stopped after one episode of TAR 29? I consider Jason’s opinions about TAR no longer valid from this point forward. The TAR 29 premiere is probably the best premiere episode in about a decade.

canada complaints 6 48

Yeah, what did you think his name was going to be? Appleseed?

appleseed.jpg

Although Johnny Appleseed looks like he was in Fubar too.

fubar

See?

 

canada complaints 6 49

No, they are going to go Full Monty with Monty.

canada complaints 6 50

No.

canada complaints 6 51

Well, Kevin effectively pissed off all of the Chinese people in Richmond and all of the East Indians in British Columbia with that statement. . .and I don’t think they expect Canada to bow to them.

canada complaints 6 52

Well this got political fast.

canada complaints 6 53

torch.jpg

Thank God we don’t have any torches on the Internet.

canada complaints 6 54

Have you REALLY been watching it, Sandi?

canada complaints 6 55

K. Thanks for subscribing to the official FB page.

canada complaints 6 56

Why is this conversation happening in public?

andy bernard.jpg

And chaffing is a concern. Just ask the Nard Dog.

canada complaints 6 57

If you are not outraged, then you are not paying attention.

Now to a discussion about Sam & Paul. . .

canada complaints 6 60

This was a fun thread for Sam’s mom to read.

canada complaints 6 61

sidney crosby.jpg

There are more selfies in Canada than maple syrup and women who masturbate to Sidney Crosby.

canada complaints 6 62

French is their first language. Who wants to translate GTFO? Any volunteers?

canada complaints 6 63

Glenn answered with a “yes,” but then his reasoning went downhill from there. Remember that time where being at the back of the pack impacted your position in the next leg of TAR Canada?

canada complaints 6 64

Man, old people commenting on TARC are really lame.

juice box

And we all know the dancing juice box is the best moment in TAR international history!

.

.

.

asia-patana-1

Just kidding. It’s Deputy Minister Patana.

canada complaints 6 65

Gord’s opinion isn’t an opinion, though. It’s just wrong. Like other people named Gord who have opinions.

And if Fort MacMurray, Corner Brook, Nelson, and Castlegar aren’t rural enough for Gord then. . .my god, we’re going to have a leg in Cherryville next year.

canada complaints 6 66

And now you know!

canada complaints 6 67

How many teams are we comparing Kevin & Ryan to this week?

canada complaints 6 68

Serious answer: I also think they are too easy this year.

See, not everything I say is a joke.

canada complaints 6 69

Terri agrees with you, Tom. I would love to see the route recreated for a “lame 10 year old” and see if Terri’s assumptions prove to be true.

canada complaints 6 70

The horse’s anus is also tickled pink, if I am not mistaken.

canada complaints 6 71

YOU DON’T KNOW WHEN THE CN TOWER WAS BUILT? GO BACK TO YUGOSLAVIA! SEE? I AT LEAST KNOW MY SHIT! WHAT? WHAT’S CROATIA? WHAT’S A ZERBEUH? IS THAT A TYPE OF LESBIAN? STOP CONFUSING ME!!!!

P.S. I have actually been to Croatia. Earlier this year. I loved it.canada complaints 6 72

Nor can she come up with a good enough song to save her life.

canada complaints 6 73

People say TAR Canada is xenophobic for wanting to spend nearly the whole country within our borders as a mission to boost nationalistic pride, but I think Julie has taken it to the next level. Like, thirty more levels. Yikes.

canada complaints 6 74

How were Adam & Andrea supposed to know that a team who has already been saved by a NEL and has nearly been eliminated in three other legs would waste a thirty minute lead during a simple drive to the U-Turn board–oh wait.

canada complaints 6 75

TAR Canada: A budget so low they can’t afford enough camera operators.

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