This is the only weekly segment on my TAR blog where I do not make many pop culture references. Be grateful.
WEEK TWO WINNER’S EDIT PROJECTIONS (The following is the order of those who have the best chance of winning based on the edit set forth by production)
1) PARUL & MAGGIE
They are NOT your typical winner’s edit!
Oh wait. They are. We receive backstory about Parul, they are edited as being quite strong despite not even finishing the best out of the four all-female teams, and it is a rare occasion where an all-female team with a pageantry background is receiving a positive reaction from the audience.
For now, Parul & Maggie are frontrunners.
2) ERIC & RONA
Everyone was supposed to be frightened as Eric & Rona were on the brink of being eliminated in the ridiculous Starting Line Elimination twist.
Their airtime didn’t end there, though. They narrated nearly every task, and we were aware of their progress along the way.
Eric & Rona are almost certainly going to be in the Final Four. But are they going to win?
Well, it has been one fucking episode. I need more time to figure that out. Jesus.
3) VICKY & RACHEL
Vicky & Rachel are in the most precarious position of all in this ranking. If they continue their over-the-top bickering, they will plummet to the bottom of this list by next week.
However, this could be the beginning of a ‘redemption’ edit. Freight parties will become the newest rage in Southeast Asia by the end of this season.
P.S. Vicky probably refused to do the Charlie’s Angels pose because he claims Rachel nagged him.
4) TOM & ANITA
Wildcards. I have no idea where to put Tom & Anita for now. JK & Mike talked about them in a confessional. When one team offers commentary on another team, that is a critical component to a logical winner’s edit.
5) BRANDON & ALPHAEUS
“Our goal is top three.”
*Gets top three in the first leg*
Is their storyline already over and resolved? If a new one does not emerge, this could very well be it for them. I feel like there is a chess related pun I could use, but I will hold back until next week.
6) LOUISA & TREASURI
For a team that finished second, they sure didn’t receive much attention. The attention assigned to Parul & Maggie is what we should have expected for Louisa & Treasuri if they were going to win this damn race.
Unfortunately, that did not happen. I am expecting Louisa & Treasuri to have a yo-yo effect in the standings. Nothing will be consistent with them.
7) JK & MIKE
For each week that I discount JK & Mike’s chances of winning this season according to the edit, the funnier it gets.
8) ALEX & WILL
Has anything been mentioned about them other than their muscles?
9) YVONNE & CHLOE
Nearly eliminated, but yet no suspense was created for their survival? Things aren’t looking good for Yvonne & Chloe.
WEEK TWO PREDICTIONS (The following is the order I expect everyone to arrive at the next pit stop)
1) ALEX & WILL (5.0 Team Average)
Another straightforward round up ahead in rural Indonesia will likely lead to nothing but physical tasks.
This is the perfect environment for calm muscle-bound dudes like Alex & Will. Until we shift to rounds with more variety, Alex & Will should be a safe bet for now.
2) TOM & ANITA (8.0 Team Average)
A strong showing from Tom & Anita occurred in the first leg. Their momentum was stopped due to an ondel-ondel folly.
I think Tom & Anita are going to be on the podium more than any other team this season. Don’t let their opening placement on paper fool you.
3) PARUL & MAGGIE (7.0 Team Average)
We haven’t seen much of Parul & Maggie’s skills as of yet. They are supposed to be sharp, right? Let’s give them the benefit of the doubt and presume they shall land on the podium by the end of the second round.
4) ERIC & RONA (4.0 Team Average)
They will improve and bear hug the top of the leaderboard soon. Just. . .just not yet. Their determination and resilience will give them a big advantage as the race progresses.
5) BRANDON & ALPHAEUS (1.0 Team Average)
In the first round, Brandon & Alphaeus were playing Chess while everyone else was playing Checkers.
6) RACHEL & VICKY (6.0 Team Average)
Who knew Rachel would be more competitive than Vicky? Wow.
I cannot see Vicky & Rachel ever finishing in the top half during any leg this season. It will be hilarious to see how they miraculously survive each episode.
The trainwreck is ready to make its next stop, and we’ll be right there with them.
7) JK & MIKE (3.0 Team Average)
Mike is going to hit a snag? He will, but it won’t be enough to put them out of the race. That would be too obvious.
On the other hand, I do not see JK & Mike performing well this round. They shall fall somewhere near the bottom, but Michael Harmstone’s Indonesian hitman shall fail the job.
8) LOUISA & TREASURI (2.0 Team Average)
Allan keeps going on and on in his behind the scenes footage about how much of a surprise it was to see Louisa & Treasuri nearly winning the opening round.
Does he know something we don’t? Should we be re-adjusting our expectations? I’ll take Allan’s Wuverse Psychology at face value and throw Louisa & Treasuri near the bottom.
9) YVONNE & CHLOE (9.0 Team Average)
TAR Asia has a nasty history of those on the bottom remaining on the bottom at the start of a season. Yvonne & Chloe shall fall victim to the Yani & Nadine/Edwin & Monica Hall of Fame.
10) LISA & NICOLE (11.0 Team Average)
I don’t know how it happened, but producers are bringing back Lisa & Nicole for the second leg.
A task has been spoiled at the start of next episode where all ten teams will have to search for nine yellow coffee beans amongst thousands to exchange for their next clue.
All signs point to Lisa & Nicole missing out on that final bean.
NOTE: I didn’t make any jokes at the expense of JK and/or Anita, Tara Basro, or Gino & Jesse. Do I get a cookie? I should.