This is the last week before I get more in-depth with each team’s edit. Once tonight’s episode airs, I feel like I will have enough data to make stronger claims as to where I estimate where each team will finish based on edit.
1) JOEL & ASHLEY
The edit has gone out of its way to make sure we are impressed by everything Joel & Ashley have done thus far. Ashley’s Mrs. Universe label could have easily been manipulated into a subject of ridicule like other TAR contestants with a background in pageantry, but nuh uh, not with Ashley.
Also, thanks to Muneeb, I have been told that there have been a couple of cases where a team has finished 1st despite having a penalty. However, the teams immediately checking in behind the 1st place team also had penalties in each scenario.
Therefore, Joel & Ashley can pat themselves on the back for a truly badass achievement. This week they should intentionally tamper with a Detour setup, take the wrong mode of transportation, and still get 1st place once again. You have to top what you did one week earlier–that is how television works.
2) STEPH & KRISTEN
“You don’t have to love me. . .you don’t even have to like me. . .but you will respect me because I’M A BOSS!” — Kelis.
3) JULIE & LOWELL
There could be such a thing as being too positive if we don’t get an ounce of negativity from Julie & Lowell. Otherwise, they will be filling the shoes that I thought would belong to Stephane & Antoine all season long.
4) RITA & YVETTE
We are being provided little snippets of Rita & Yvette that are not essential to what is happening to them in the race. For instance, was it critical for the viewer to know that they used to memorize songs by Janet Jackson? That bit came out of left field, in my opinion.
5) ANNE & TANYA
Italian Moms. Italian Vikings. And now, the greatest Italian Fainter since the heatstroke of Michelangelo’s brush. We are finally getting some depth to them, and Anne’s over-the-top positive edit while Tanya was ready to do her best impression of me in high school boosts them in the standings.
6) KELLY & KATE
Kelly & Kate battling back after consecutive ninth place finishes was not really the central point of storytelling during the last episode. This does not bode well for their overall winner’s edit.
7) EMMETT & JILLIAN
I guess I am currently channeling my inner Emmett by blatantly ignoring their chance of having a winner’s edit at the moment.
8) FRANKIE & AMY
Where the content at? Are you guys receiving the Express Pass? Because I think you are.
PREDICTIONS FOR WEEK FOUR’S ORDER OF ARRIVAL
1) STEPH & KRISTEN – 3.33333333333333 Team Average
They have an Express Pass to give away. Will they use their own when frazzled in Vietnam, and boost themselves to the top for this week? Or are they going to maintain their strong performance and claim their first leg win of the season without any additional help? I’d bet the dong in my pocket that they have what it takes to win this round.
2) KELLY & KATE – 7.0 Team Average
Because we have confirmation that Kelly & Kate have traveled extensively through Southeast Asia, I feel comfortable with putting Kelly & Kate this high without feeling unintentionally racist. A city as culture shock-y as Ho Chi Minh City for the other teams shall be to Kelly & Kate’s advantage.
3) EMMETT & JILLIAN – 2.0 Team Average
I initially thought they would win this leg, but Emmett or Jillian having to do karaoke in Vietnamese sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. I have a feeling Cotton Eyed Joe will not be on the playlist. Sorry guys.
4) JOEL & ASHLEY – 3.0 Team Average
If Mrs. Universe fails at eating bugs, I can already hear the casual fans warming up their fingers on the keyboard to label her as a princess. Prove dem haters wrong, Ashley. Be a boss. Puke if you must, but whatever you do, don’t let the casuals be right.
5) RITA & YVETTE – 7.0 Team Average
Seeing how Rita & Yvette excel at karaoke due to their love of singing along to Janet Jackson songs, Rita & Yvette just need to secretly have a childhood love of eating bugs to make it a strong day for them. However, much like TAR 28, there is a clear divide between how well the top four teams have been doing compared to the bottom four. We need this trend to be put to rest soon.
6) JULIE & LOWELL – 6.333 Team Average
The Cai Be round officially signaled the start of endurance coming into play. Considering that is what Julie & Lowell are built for, this could be the point where they finally start making ground in the standings. Otherwise, they will be Ho Chi Finished. If not for Stephane & Antoine’s penalty, they were dangerously close to going Cai Bye Bye.
7) FRANKIE & AMY – 4.667 Team Average
Braixen & Glaceon have performed on a very consistent basis hovering around the middle of the pack. What I have noticed is that we haven’t seen a huge strength from them other than possessing good judgment in key situations. In other words, they may be one of the most level-headed in the cast, which is amusing when their free-spirited nature and physical appearance may suggest to you otherwise.
Wait. Their names are Frankie & Amy. Sorry, I have had Pokemon on the brain lately.
8) ANNE & TANYA – 7.0 Team Average
Anne & Tanya haven’t really beat anybody left in this race by a significant margin. However, with Tanya just barely recovering from epic heat stroke, I can’t help but feel that Anne & Tanya may be going into this round with their greatest disadvantage yet.