TUF 7 episodes 10 + 11 + 12 ranking

Tenth episode

Previously on TUF: Cale rubbed CB the wrong way. The quarterfinals began with Jesse Taylor dominating Dante Rivera. Amir Sadollah pulled off another shocker by choking out Matt Brown. Next Tim Credeur battles Dan Cramer and CB Dollaway takes on Cale Yarbrough. Who will survive and move one step closer to becoming the ultimate fighter?

– Episode ten and I love how I know nothing about most of these guys.

– Flashback. Dana is wow’ed. Fight recap. Chipper says it was a war. Whoa, Chipper’s hair is red now. Jesse loved Amir’s karate kick straight to the face. Chipper has never seen Dana react to a fight so much. Jesse said Amir is surprising people all the time. Rampage comments it was a great fight. Jeremy wants to fight Matt again to get his re-match. He wanted Matt to win so he’d feel good about being beaten but now he wants the re-match. Jeremy boasts about how fighters he beats asks for a re-match in the cage.

– Jeremy is in Matt Brown’s locker room. He asks Matt for a re-match at the finale. Matt doesn’t know what Jeremy is talking about because Jeremy’s nose is broken.

– House time. Matt tells everyone about Jeremy asking for a re-match.

JESSE: What a f—ing punk dude. You don’t ask for a re-match after he breaks your jaw and neck off. He’s retarded. He will not be in the UFC. If he is invited back to the UFC I will s— in both hands and put it on my face.
CALE: Done! I gotta see this.
JESSE: I’ll take that back.

– Jesse keeps slamming Jeremy in the most unintelligible voice possible. Talks about him having a broken nose, queer, d—face, d—, loser, a broken nose b—, and a schmuck even when Jeremy walks in halfway through.

– Jeremy is pissed. Jeremy talks s— directly to someone’s face and not behind their back. He hates that Jesse stopped talking when he walked in the room. So Jeremy sits with Gerald. Yes. There is a Gerald this season. Gerald is wearing glasses. Jeremy says he will get Jesse so pissed that he will punch him. Gerald says Jesse won’t fall for it unless Jeremy puts his hands on Jesse first. Jeremy is confident Jesse will touch him. Gerald says Jesse is in the semis. Jeremy’s plan is to get Jesse so pissed that he will punch him and be kicked off the show.

Well if that isn’t the biggest cheap shot of a plan I have heard. If it didn’t work for Southworth and Koscheck when they bugged Leben I doubt it will be allowed here.

– Horror music plays at night. Jeremy is taking shots. He walks over and sits directly across from Jesse in the living room.

JESSE: I think it was disrespectful what you did to Matt Brown. It’s disrespectful to call someone out who just beat your a–. If you want to know the f—ing truth. That’s all I got to say.
JEREMY: DISRESPECT HOW?
JESSE: I don’t want to get into it. I’m playing Spades. I don’t want to–
JEREMY: TALK B—!
JESSE: Don’t call me a f—ing b—-, man.
JEREMY: You are a b—-, man if you are–
JESSE: You are a f—ing b—- so don’t call me a b—-, man.
JEREMY: Well bleep bleep bleep
JESSE: Bleep bleep it’s not disrespectful I’m saying it to your face. So you’re bleep bleep bleep out of line buddy. You showed us you are a bleep bleeep bleeep b—-.
JEREMY: F— you, you’re a b—-.
JESSE: What did you say? “I will f— you b—-?” I’m a f—ing b—-? Why would you even say that? Why would you say something like that?
ONE OF THE OTHER GUYS: It’s okay, he’s Jewish.
JEREMY: He is really Jewish?
JESSE: Yeah. You got a problem with that? I got some Jewish blood.
MIKE: I got some Jewish blood too.
JESSE: You got a f—ing problem with that? What the f— is your f—ing problem.
(JESSE stands up. Four guys hold him back. JEREMY is smiling.
JESSE: Seriously. F— you!
(We see a front kick by JESSE that cuts to commercial before we see whether or not it connects.)
(We return. JESSE did kick him.)
JESSE: You’re a f—ing a– dude! Why would you say something so stupid you f—ing broken nose mothaf—er! Get the f— out of here dude! You stupid f—ing s— dude!

– Four guys get in Jesse’s face and calm him down. Jeremy keeps going that if someone talks s— behind his back that he will talk s— to them.

MIKE: JEREMY MAY IS AN IDIOT! A FREAKIN IDIOT! You don’t disrespect athletes. You don’t disrespect fighters especially in the biggest organization in the world. That kid needs to go home and get a personality. That kid SUCKS!

It took like five episodes but welcome back, Mike Dolce.

– Jeremy apologizes. The chances Jesse thought that apology was sincere? 0.01%. Jeremy wanted one bump of the fist to say they squashed it then another to say he’s sorry. Not a single person thinks the apology was sincere.

– Official weigh ins. Oh right. This is a fighting show. Forrest wants Tim to move his feet and use his better jiu jitsu. Rampage thinks Cramer needs to duke it out with Tim and stop the takedowns.

RAMPAGE: Both guys got the same height, same weight, same ugly.
TIM: He’s way hotter.

Even TUF has its share of bromances.

– Fight day. Tim says he is fighting the hottest cast member of the season. Cramer comments Tim has been in the fight game for a long time.

TIM: I think Dan’s in a lot of trouble everywhere and I think I’m going to bring tears to the eyes of 16 year old girls nationwide.

16 year old girls whose name is ‘Tim’.

– Tim punches GSP’s face a bunch of times before leaving the locker room. More damage than Matt Hughes ever did to GSP.

DANIEL CRAMER / BETHEL, CONNETICUT / 3-0
TIM CREDEUR / BREAUX BRIDGE, LOUISIANA / 10-2

– Herb Dean is our referee.

– They touch gloves. Tim fires a leg kick. Cramer is too late with a counter. Both trade vicious strikes. Tim got the better of the exchange. Cramer launches a body kick that Tim captures and takes Cramer against the cage. Cramer is the one who takes Tim down and has side control. Cramer swivels to go into guard then lets Tim stand up. He goes after Tim who keeps blocking punches. Cramer clinches and takes Tim to the ground. Full mount. Tim spins to be in Cramer’s guard. Tim throws punches before passing guard to side control. But Cramer scrambles to stand. Both are against the cage. Somehow Cramer drags Tim to the mat. Tim has a heel hook. Cramer keeps grabbing the fence and Herb tells him not to do so. Cramer finally lets go and falls to the mat. Cramer taps.

– We go to the Tinactin fight replay. Rampage says it was alright. Credeur thinks he should have punched instead of covered and can’t believe he got taken down. Rampage thought Cramer was doing fine on the ground so he let Cramer work in the mount. Tim wanted to keep on coming. Forrest believed turning from half guard to a heel hook was a great finish. Credeur believes he has so much potential.

– Rampage pep talks Cramer and says he will be a much better fighter. Tim and Cramer congratulate each other. Cramer feels like he could have won the fight and feels stupid for making a mistake against someone as skilled as Tim. He will keep training and believes he will make it to the UFC. Into the van he goes.

– House time. CB has caught Cale staring at him lately making stupid faces. Isn’t there an age requirement to apply to be on Ultimate Fighter? CB decides he’ll burn a ‘C’ in his arm to beas big of a punk as Cale.

– Rampage training session. CB trains furiously. He thinks Cale’s only strength is that he’s a street brawler. He intends to pass his guard and smash his face in.

RAMPAGE: We only have one strategy–whoop his a–. Only thing we have written down. (Mimes writing) Whoop his a–. I feel sorry for Cale.

– Forrest training session.

TIM: Cale Yarbrough the Cage Fighter
He proves it all in the cage
His head the size of a gesapo melon
Cale Yarbrough the cage fighter

No wonder Tim thinks cage fighting is his only career option.

– Cale was not impressed by CB’s performance in previous fights. Forrest thinks CB is an arrogant pr—.

– Van time. Wait? It’s a field trip! That’s right. It only took ten episodes but the fighters get their first “We’ve been stuck in the house for ‘X’ amount of time to get out and have fun” batch of confessionals. The field trip?

Go-karting.

ATTENDANT (waving green flag): LET’S GET IT ON!

Please never speak again.

– So we watch fighters Go-Kart. No idea who is winning. We know Forrest sucks at it. Rampage claims he was doing really well. Shells and banana peels would be more interesting.

– House time. End of field trip already. Everyone is revved up from go-karting and are drinking. People are tugging chandeliers and dunking a basketball to break the hoop. So they tossed the hoop over the rail and into the walkway. Then walls are smashed. Stools, bats, and their own heads are used to break down walls. Somebody smashes the railing in too. Somebody takes a chair and breaks a painting.

– Holy crap they have taken the entire railing apart! It is thrown into the entranceway. Somebody else throws something into the walkway. All furniture  is in the walkway too. Windows were broken too. Before I can say ‘kristalnacht’ Jesse references that it was like World War III. Chipper apologizes to his parents. Never has the house been so destroyed. It is a record after seven seasons. The entranceway is like a hoarder’s entranceway. They all liked to take out the aggression.

– Cale is relaxed. It’s fight day.

CB DOLLAWAY / TEMPE, ARIZONA / 6-0
CALE YARBROUGH / ATHENS, GEORGIA / 0-0

– Herb Dean is our referee.

– They touch gloves. They counter each other’s punches. Not much contact is made. CB lands the occasional leg kick and body kicks. CB shoots.  CB works Cale onto the ground and is in side control. Strikes. More strikes. Then full mount. Cale is covering up and bucks to give his back to CB. CB settles for giving up the hooks and keeps punching CB who is turtling over. Herb insists for CB to fight back. Herby insists for CB to fight back again. And again. CB never does. The fight is over. CB gets the win.

– Dana summarizes that CB is mean and nasty and believes Rampage is confident he has the guy who will win the whole thing. Save me CB, you’re my only hope. CB looks for a fist bump in the locker room while Rampage is on his cell phone. CB is certain he can beat any of the other three guys.

– Forrest is killed by CB’s cockiness and vocalizes it as Cale sits in the locker room. Amir says Forrest isn’t much for speeches. Forrest begs one of the three (Jesse, Amir, and Tim) to beat CB. Forrest believes Jesse has the chance of beating CB so Jesse will fight CB and Amir will fight Tim.

– Van time. The record scratches. They enter the gym. Dana enters as well. Record scratches too. Both teams are there. Forrest is there too. But Rampage is missing. No one knows where Rampage has gone to. I wonder if the cell phone was shown intentionally? They waited for Rampage for 45 minutes before entering alone with Forrest. He thought immediately that he will get his picks. He is stoked. Dana chuckles and brings in the guys.

CB: Tim.
TIM: Amir.
AMIR: Tim.
JESSE: CB, but I’ll pick whoever.
DANA: Who do you think are the two best guys here?
FORREST: I don’t know. I think CB is probably the best.
DANA: I do too. Who do you think is the other best?
FORREST: I don’t know. Hard to say.
DANA: I’ll tell you what I like. . .

(RAMPAGE enters to empty room.)

RAMPAGE: What happened was the night before I couldn’t sleep because I was watching TV and a real good movie was on so I fell asleep then woke up too late. I didn’t even have time to brush my teeth.

Ah. The Damon & Andre of The Ultimate Fighter.

– Dana holds the meeting. The first fight is Jesse versus Tim. Jesse is shocked. The other fight is CB against Amir. Amir says it is good to expect the unexpected. CB acknowledges Amir is his toughest competition.

– Forrest says all of his brown nosing didn’t work. Even without Rampage in the room.

– Next time on TUF: It’s time for the Coach’s Challenge. Only four fighters are left. Jesse Taylor, Tim Credeur, Amir Sadollah, and CB Dollaway. Who has what it takes to be the next ultimate fighter?

MIDDLEWEIGHTS

TEAM RAMPAGE

BRANDON SENE 0
CB DOLLAWAY 11
DANIEL CRAMER 4
GERALD HARRIS 2
JEREMY MAY 3
MATTHEW RIDDLE 3
MIKE DOLCE 1
PATRICK SCHULTZ 0

TEAM FORREST

AMIR SADOLLAH 3
CALE YARBROUGH 4
DANTE RIVERA 0
JESSE TAYLOR 7
LUKE ZACHRICH 0
MATT BROWN 1
NICK KLEIN 2
TIM CREDEUR 8

Rank the fights

1) Dan Simmler vs. Matthew Riddle (Guys? What happened? Which episode are we on? Did these two fight? I can’t remember if they fought. They didn’t fight? Was it an amateur bout? Was it real? F— you, Rampage tell me what happened!)

2) Amir Sadollah vs. Matt Brown (Rock em sock em robots in the octagon. Both have excellent chins. I have never seen fighters survive so many doggone knees. The ground game was highly technical prior to Amir locking on the submission.)

3) Matthew Riddle vs. Tim Credeur (The pace was great. There was some decent striking. Excellent back and forth on the ground. No idea who would win either. Tim pulled out the submission with only 50 seconds left in the fight to avoid a Cecil Peoples scorecard. Awesome.)

4) Gerald Harris vs. Amir Sadollah (Gerald engineers the biggest slams ever seen on TUF. Sure there was a bit too much holding but Amir’s striking and scrambling that concludes with a KO by a knee to the chin makes this fight worth viewing again and again.)

5) CB Dollaway vs. Nick Klein (Numerous sweeps and submission attempts. Striking on the feet. It’s too bad Nick tapped out so quickly at the end.)

6) Josh Hall vs. Matt Brown (An incredible pace. Both guys gave it their all. Submission attempts, slams, kicks, punches, grappling. Funky positions on the ground. Another one of Rampage’s friends goes down. The unknown Cincinnati Kid takes it all with a really smart game plan. Best fight of the first two episodes beside the outrageous knockout.)

7) Jeremy May vs. Matt Brown (Jeremy May acts like a jack— all season. His cardio is terrible. He appears that he may beat Matt Brown after all. But then the pain comes. And a sweet head kick KO.)

8) Daniel Cramer vs. Luke Zachrich (A fight where fatigue was a factor. Both of these guys deserve credit for taking a bunch of knees and nasty hits before Luke had zero energy left in him and let Daniel win.)

9) Daniel Cramer vs. Tim Credeur (They started off striking. Cramer was uh sweepin, but then Credeur got on top and Cramer was uh beaten. Pretty boy tapped to a telegraphed heel hook.)

10) Cale Yarbrough vs. John Clarke (Excellent grappling match-up. Dropping seventeen pounds in one day can really affect your fighting ability.)

11) Tim Credeur vs. Erik Charles (Erik’s claim to being the fastest guy is debunked as Tim’s slick black belt jiu jitsu travels at rocket speed to successfully take Erik down and submit him within about thirty seconds. Great lessons to be taught from Tim’s technique.)

12) Brandon Sene vs. Dante Rivera (‘Twas a fine grappling match for a good chunk of it. Fights going to the third round avoid BS decisions. For the most part. Unfortunately this fight should have been a draw in round three and go to a fourth round. Oh well. It triggered Rampage flipping over s—.)

13) CB Dollaway vs. Cale Yarbrough (A fight all of us will forget by the end of the season. It was the quarterfinals. CB got Cale to the ground after about a minute. Strikes. Full mount. More strikes. Referee stoppage. End scene.)

14) Patrick Schultz vs. Cale Yarbrough (Neither fighter knew what to do on the ground. A few strikes traded until Cale decides to take Patrick down halfway through the first round and continue to do so until the end of the fight.

15) Luke Zachrich vs. Patrick Schultz (Great technique by both fighters except with Patrick taking himself down despite having the under hooks.)

16) Prince McLean vs. Mike Dolce (An overall good match I s’pose. Striking and grappling proves both of them were very capable of making it into the house.)

17) Steve Byrnes vs. Amir Sadollah (A slow war of attrition before Amir pulls out the victory/the arm.)

18) Nick Rossborough vs. Jesse Taylor (There was a guy who somewhat resembled Slim Shady and possessed a Boston Rob accent. That’s about it.)

19) Jeremy May vs. Dave Roberts (Nothing noteworthy about this early bout. Rampage loses a dear friend.)

20) Mike Dolce vs. Jesse Taylor (Jesse could have finished the fight so much earlier. Or be more aggressive with his excellent position. Same goes for Dolce in the few instances when he had the dominating spot.)

21) Dante Rivera vs. Jesse Taylor (Jesse’s third showing and my goodness it is worse than ever. Snoozer. Heavyweight fights in TUF 2 have more action than a Jesse fight.)

Eleventh episode

– Previously on TUF: Jesse Taylor outlasted Dante Rivera to earn a place in the semi-finals. Jeremy almost goaded Jesse into throwing it all away. And Tim Credeur moved into the semis with a first round heel hook on Dan Cramer. Now it’s Taylor versus Credeur in the first semi-final match-up. The winner will advance to the final and fight for the right to become the ultimate fighter.

– Intro time. I wonder if you play the intro song backwards it says “This song is a gigantic steaming pile of s—”. I’m going to assume that’s the case unless I hear strict proof telling me otherwise. Guilty until proven innocent, right?

– Forrest training session. Dana thinks that the best guys made it to the semis regardless of which team or which coaches they have. Tim and Jesse both are happy one of them will go to the finals even if it means destroying each other. For the first time Forrest is going to corner in a teammate versus teammate match. Forrest and Matt Brown will corner Jesse while Cameron and some other guy will coach Tim. Is it inappropriate for a coach to do so? Liddell, Franklin, Hughes, Serra, and Pulver watch from the audience without cheering anyone on specifically.

– Hotel time. Dana tells us about the Coach’s Challenge that is a tradition since season three.

DANA: I hope you like to play cards.
FORREST: F—.
RAMPAGE: F—. I suck at gambling.

Do they ever pick a sport that either of the coaches are good at?

– Dana enters the suite and there’s a basketball court. He tricked them all along. Forrest played basketball in high school but hasn’t shot a ball in two years. Rampage thinks he’s the worst basketball player on the planet. We see Forrest swish while Rampage is throwing balls riding the rim or air-balling.

– Dana says they will play HORSE but instead of HORSE it will be ULTIMATE FIGHTER. That is one long game of HORSE. When I played HORSE on Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 2 I changed it to BOOGERGERM. I was nine years old and stupid then. Dana opens the box of 10k for the winning coach. The players from the winning team will each win a grand. However, if Rampage can nail the 3-pointer Dana will double the fighter money. Rampage’s dribbling sucks but he makes it. Dana curses instantly. Dana is all smiles as he congratulates Rampage. Gerald said the team was excited until Forrest started shooting like Larry Byrd in his prime. Of course. The one white basketball player until the 90s is referenced.

– No points are recapped. Forrest won game point with a slam dunk. Dana says Rampage better hold onto that title because he has no future in basketball. I guess if the US has a black president then we can have a black man who sucks at basketball.

– House time. Jesse Taylor says he is JT Money. Why? Because him and Tim are getting their heads shaved for the fight. One guy is engraving dollar signs into Jesse’s hair. Ah. I understand why it’s JT Money now. Tim says it is a real life cartoon when one talks to Jesse because what comes out of his mouth does not come out of a normal person’s mouth.

JESSE: I’m like a flock of seagulls
Sitting
Waiting
Watching
Yearning
For the chance to strive
Therefore I exist

Look out Frost someone is hot on your heels!

– Jesse shadow boxes. And what’s this? A TUF 2 tradition is revived as Jesse puts on Right Guard. No zoom-in on the deodorant box though. It could be Old Spice considering it’s red. Oh how I miss the days of Keith Jardine proclaiming he goes through Xyience like blueberries.

– Everyone makes fun of JT’s money signs and says it looks like testicles. Jesse whines like Napoleon Dynamite. Next he’ll be asking for lip chap because his lips are really chapped. Now it’s night time. Tim refuses to partake in the drinking and not use Jesse as a benchmark. Jesse is hugging Tim and is slurring his speech. Tim says it has gone from the Ultimate Fighter House to Animal House. I think after breaking off the railing last episode it would be called “No House”.

– Jesse says he will only have a beer and two more shots. More shots are consumed. Mike says Jesse went from zero to six hundred. We see him do D-Generation X impressions and jumping onto the billiard table. He broke a bunch of blinds and ran through the house with his bottle of vodka like he’s Emmitt Smith holding onto a football.

– Jesse breaks the glass on the top of a beer. Tim says to not be an idiot and takes the beer away from Jesse. He convinces Jesse to go into the hot tub. Nothing like alcohol mixed with being in water. Jesse puts on his trunks and stands in the hallway to urinate on himself like he’s Milhouse Van Houten. We see the urine drop onto the floor. It’s a bit much.

JESSE: I’m totally pissing my pants! I pissed my pants!
TIM: It’s one of those nights where you feel like you’re in an alternate universe.

– Jesse is eating spaghetti in the hot tub then he has the brilliant idea to hold himself under water because he does not want to leave the hot tub. Tim realizes Jesse could drown and body locks Jesse underwater to bring him to the surface. He helps him up a stairwell that has no railing. Tim puts him to bed and Jesse snores like a freight train for the next 4 1/2 hours.

– Morning at the house. It is a mess. Boxes, bottles, and cans EVERYWHERE. Amir says the house has been remodeled by an angry caveman.

– Jesse stands on top of the wall of the backyard. Sober but as crazy as ever. He proclaims to Nevada and its athletic commission that he is king of the world. Tim joins him. Jesse calls himself Coco. Tim knows regardless if Jesse drinks a ton or none that he will fight like a maniac juggernaut for 3 5-minute rounds.

– Van time. Tim finds it surreal he is fighting his best friend in the house. They are practicing in the gym together until later in the day when they separate. Tim goes to the cage and gives Jesse on advice because he wants Jesse to be successful and help his teammate. He gives him advice on how to avoid a triangle which is what happens to him in practice all the time. Tim is doing it to beat the best Jesse possible.

– Official weigh ins. Brought us by Scion. Dana says Jesse is a wrestler and Tim is a jiu jitsu. Dana thinks they might stand up because Jesse will be too scared to be on the ground with Tim or maybe Jesse will not respect Tim’s ground game and work to take him down anyway. Tim compliments JT’s dimples.

– House time. Jesse talks about his boring kids that none of us care about. He said he can write a poem about his kid but not really. What a tease. Tim talks about being in the Final Four is a big deal and that six months ago he was ready to retire. He tears up too about his family and his wife was the only one to convince him to stay with it. It’s the TSN Turning Point in his whole life.

– The nauseating family talk is over. Fight day. Tim was told to never quit because only the strong survive. Is his friend Charles Darwin? They are in the locker rooms. Tim says he can turn the tables. Jesse is powerful and explosive. If by “powerful” you mean “lay” and by “explosive” you mean “pray” then you are correct, Jesse.

JESSE TAYLOR / TEMECULA, CALIFORNIA / 6-2
TIM CREDEUR / BREAUX BRIDGE, LOUISIANA / 10-2

– This fight is THREE 5-minute rounds. Winner goes to the live finale. Rosenthal is our referee.

– They touch gloves. Circling. Tim leg kicks. Jesse shoots and takes Tim down. Full guard. Tim temporarily holds onto the cage. Tim pushes off the cage to move. Jesse uses elbows and fists to the ribs. Elbows to the face. Jesse is striking the head for once. Punches to Tim’s face. Tim has a wrist trapped. Jesse uses brute strength to get out of it and escapes a triangle. Back to full guard. Jesse stands up which lets Tim body lock and change his guard. But Jesse works his way into Tim’s full guard. Tim has an arm trapped. He pulls but Jesse yanks it out. Tim does it again. Jesse yanks it out. Elbows from Jesse. Tim is holding Jesse close. Jesse gets in a few strikes. End of round. Tim spits out blood. Forrest tells Jesse to protect his neck like what the Wu says.

– They touch gloves. Tim fires a head kick. Jesse shoots. They scramble on the ground. Jesse is in Tim’s full guard. Tim isn’t sweeping. Jesse keeps Tim on his back. Tim is working the arms. But Jesse spends time and effort keeping it out. First strike of the round is fired at 3:47. Tim has butterfly guard. Tim sweeps but Jesse scrambles to put Tim on his back. Tim spins for a heel hook but Jesse backs away. Tim has full mount! Tim has Jesse’s back! The hooks are in. Back to full mount.  Jesse bucks and sweeps to get back into Tim’s full guard. I love how Jesse’s counters aren’t to advance to position. They are to keep the fight in a stagnant position. Jesse has Tim pushed against the cage. He stands temporarily. Tim has an arm trapped but Jesse closes the distance. Tim is on his side against the cage. Jesse is slowly pushing him away from the cage. Jesse fires a couple elbows. Jesse has side control and is crashing down with elbows. He has Tim’s back. He flattens Tim and reigns down fists. Corner is shouting for Tim to grab Jesse’s wrist. Jesse is in Tim’s full guard. End of round.

– They touch gloves. They circle. Tim gets a few strikes before Jesse shoots. Tim fends it off and brings Jesse up from the legs. Jesse lowers and takes Tim down again. Jesse tries to advance position for side control but Tim has butterfly guard. Tim bucks Jesse when he tries to advance and back in butterfly. Tim uses the butterfly to get back on his feet and take Jesse’s back. Tim tries to go for an arm but Jesse rotates to be in Tim’s half guard. Jesse has an arm trapped between Tim’s legs but yanks it out and goes for side control but goes into Tim’s full guard. Jesse raises up to punch Tim’s head full force then back into full guard. Tim regains butterfly guard. Tim attempts a sweep but Jesse pushes him back down. Good ol’ guard. Their bodies clinch. Half guard. Then back into full guard. Tim is zapped out of energy. He puts his legs on the cage. Jesse throws a few strikes. Tim is elbowing from the bottom. Tim is holding Jesse. Tim slaps on a triangle but Jesse gets out of it easily. Half guard. Tim has a rubber guard. Both throw wild punches in the full guard. End of fight. Decent ground game in the final round. All else was crap.

– Fight recap. Jesse took Tim down and was active on top. Tim looked good whenever he had a butterfly guard to keep Jesse off balance. Jesse’s defense was good. In second round Jesse got a takedown. Tim got a sweep and was on top but Jesse rolled out and pounded on Tim some more. In the final round Tim was so close to pulling something off. But nada.

– Jesse and Tim hug. Tim is sobbing. Nothing like a sweaty tearful hug. Both cry. Maybe Jesse is a little b— like Jeremy said after all. He pukes. He tells the camera to get out of his face. Referee is waiting. Jesse brings the bucket to the verdict. I have never seen that before. In TUF or in 1500+ MMA matches.

JESSE: I had eggs.

Ah. Add insult to injury when a guy who eats poorly can keep up cardio for fifteen minutes.

– Jesse wins by unanimous decision as expected. Him and Tim hug again. Dana tells us Jesse will face the winner of Amir and CB. Forrest is happy at least one guy from his team will go to the finals regardless if it was at the expense at another one of his fighters. Tim says he gave it everything. Jesse is ready to get drunk. He lifts up Matt Brown.

JESSE: I got to win that final fight. It’s the icing on the. . .ice cube? I don’t know if I said that right.

It’s okay. A stitch in time saves nine tails. And I wonder if you had parents around to tell you nursery rhymes.

Next time on TUF: It’s the biggest battle of the season. The final fight before the main event. CB Dollaway of Team Rampage versus Amir Sadollah of Team Forrest. Who will earn the right to face Jesse Taylor for the contract? And then the most shocking ending in the history of Ultimate Fighter.

MIDDLEWEIGHTS

TEAM RAMPAGE

BRANDON SENE 0
CB DOLLAWAY 0
DANIEL CRAMER 0
GERALD HARRIS 1
JEREMY MAY 0
MATTHEW RIDDLE 0
MIKE DOLCE 1
PATRICK SCHULTZ 0

TEAM FORREST

AMIR SADOLLAH 1
CALE YARBROUGH 0
DAHTE RIVERA 0
JESSE TAYLOR 11
LUKE ZACHRICH
MATT BROWN 0
NICK KLEIN 0
TIM CREDEUR 15

Rank the fights

1) Dan Simmler vs. Matthew Riddle (Guys? What happened? Which episode are we on? Did these two fight? I can’t remember if they fought. They didn’t fight? Was it an amateur bout? Was it real? F— you, Rampage tell me what happened!)

2) Amir Sadollah vs. Matt Brown (Rock em sock em robots in the octagon. Both have excellent chins. I have never seen fighters survive so many doggone knees. The ground game was highly technical prior to Amir locking on the submission.)

3) Matthew Riddle vs. Tim Credeur (The pace was great. There was some decent striking. Excellent back and forth on the ground. No idea who would win either. Tim pulled out the submission with only 50 seconds left in the fight to avoid a Cecil Peoples scorecard. Awesome.)

4) Gerald Harris vs. Amir Sadollah (Gerald engineers the biggest slams ever seen on TUF. Sure there was a bit too much holding but Amir’s striking and scrambling that concludes with a KO by a knee to the chin makes this fight worth viewing again and again.)

5) CB Dollaway vs. Nick Klein (Numerous sweeps and submission attempts. Striking on the feet. It’s too bad Nick tapped out so quickly at the end.)

6) Josh Hall vs. Matt Brown (An incredible pace. Both guys gave it their all. Submission attempts, slams, kicks, punches, grappling. Funky positions on the ground. Another one of Rampage’s friends goes down. The unknown Cincinnati Kid takes it all with a really smart game plan. Best fight of the first two episodes beside the outrageous knockout.)

7) Jeremy May vs. Matt Brown (Jeremy May acts like a jack— all season. His cardio is terrible. He appears that he may beat Matt Brown after all. But then the pain comes. And a sweet head kick KO.)

8) Daniel Cramer vs. Luke Zachrich (A fight where fatigue was a factor. Both of these guys deserve credit for taking a bunch of knees and nasty hits before Luke had zero energy left in him and let Daniel win.)

9) Daniel Cramer vs. Tim Credeur (They started off striking. Cramer was uh sweepin, but then Credeur got on top and Cramer was uh beaten. Pretty boy tapped to a telegraphed heel hook.)

10) Cale Yarbrough vs. John Clarke (Excellent grappling match-up. Dropping seventeen pounds in one day can really affect your fighting ability.)

11) Tim Credeur vs. Erik Charles (Erik’s claim to being the fastest guy is debunked as Tim’s slick black belt jiu jitsu travels at rocket speed to successfully take Erik down and submit him within about thirty seconds. Great lessons to be taught from Tim’s technique.)

12) Brandon Sene vs. Dante Rivera (‘Twas a fine grappling match for a good chunk of it. Fights going to the third round avoid BS decisions. For the most part. Unfortunately this fight should have been a draw in round three and go to a fourth round. Oh well. It triggered Rampage flipping over s—.)

13) CB Dollaway vs. Cale Yarbrough (A fight all of us will forget by the end of the season. It was the quarterfinals. CB got Cale to the ground after about a minute. Strikes. Full mount. More strikes. Referee stoppage. End scene.)

14) Patrick Schultz vs. Cale Yarbrough (Neither fighter knew what to do on the ground. A few strikes traded until Cale decides to take Patrick down halfway through the first round and continue to do so until the end of the fight.

15) Luke Zachrich vs. Patrick Schultz (Great technique by both fighters except with Patrick taking himself down despite having the under hooks.)

16) Prince McLean vs. Mike Dolce (An overall good match I s’pose. Striking and grappling proves both of them were very capable of making it into the house.)

17) Tim Credeur vs. Jesse Taylor (At least Tim was bucking and Jesse looked to finish the fight in the third round. Although all that occurred is a decision like everyone knew it would be. Oh well.)

18) Steve Byrnes vs. Amir Sadollah (A slow war of attrition before Amir pulls out the victory/the arm.)

19) Nick Rossborough vs. Jesse Taylor (There was a guy who somewhat resembled Slim Shady and possessed a Boston Rob accent. That’s about it.)

20) Jeremy May vs. Dave Roberts (Nothing noteworthy about this early bout. Rampage loses a dear friend.)

21) Mike Dolce vs. Jesse Taylor (Jesse could have finished the fight so much earlier. Or be more aggressive with his excellent position. Same goes for Dolce in the few instances when he had the dominating spot.)

22) Dante Rivera vs. Jesse Taylor (Jesse’s third showing and my goodness it is worse than ever. Snoozer. Heavyweight fights in TUF 2 have more action than a Jesse fight.)

Twelfth episode

– Previously on TUF: The four semi-finalists prepared to go to war. In the first semi-final Jesse’s power was too much for Tim’s submissions. One finalist has been determined. One semi-final fight remains. CB Dollaway versus Amir Sadollah. Who will earn the right to face Jesse and be crowned the Ultimate Fighter?

– Intro time. Our last one of the season. I shall miss it dearly.

– Amir and CB are in their locker rooms. Whoa. It’s already Fight Day. I guess the ending is super exciting. Amir is once again labeled the underdog. Amir is used to challenges. CB says guys are too confident and forget what they need to do and make stupid mistakes. Amir doesn’t like to quit. Good. Amir says he needs to give himself enough credit.

CB DOLLAWAY / TEMPE, ARIZONA / 6-0
AMIR SADOLLAH / RICHMOND, VIRGINIA / 0-0

– It’s the last semi-final fight. Three 5-minute rounds. Winner faces Jesse Taylor at The Palms. The Hard Rock is snubbed this season. Ugh. Mazzagatti is our referee.

– They touch gloves. CB rushes in with some punches. Amir misses with a front kick. They circle. CB comes in and feints. CB rushes with a combination. They clinch. CB fires a knee then runs away. Amir gets a body kick. CB trembles but picks up Amir and slams him. CB sinks into Amir’s full guard. He spins Amir to get him away from the cage. CB holds Amir’s neck. Amir punches from the bottom. CB punches Amir’s ribs. He stands up before going back into Amir’s guard. CB fires a few more punches. CB elbows Amir’s face. Amir tries a submission but CB spreads him out. Full guard continues. Amir punches from the bottom. Rampage shouts for a knee to the butt because it always works. CB tries to pass but fails. CB picks up Amir and slams him. Amir has a butterfly to push off CB. They are on their feet. CB knees and kicks. Amir misses a leg kick and  a superman before CB shoots and takes Amir down. Amir tries a guillotine but has nothing on CB’s neck. CB cranks Amir down. CB has a knee on Amir’s chest and passes. Temporarily.  He is in Amir’s full guard. CB gets a leg over and is in half guard. He is ready to choke. He has Amir’s back. He secures full mount. Amir is bucking and spinning. CB attempts a choke but round ends. CB was so dang close. That is 10-8 no doubt.

– They touch gloves. They circle. CB comes in with a couple jabs. Amir feints. CB head kicks but blocked. Amir comes in with a combo that is blocked and CB clinches to throw knees before Amir can get away.  A few more punches and kicks blocked by both. Amir lands a body kick that drops CB. But CB is down and shoots to get Amir down. Half guard. CB is attempting a darth/dark choke or whatever it’s called. Can you tell I haven’t done any MMA training myself? Amir raises a leg to secure full guard triangle. CB has enough space to drop punches. CB swivels to north-south but Amir secures an arm and nearly has an armbar. CB is looking to tap but bucks to spin back into Amir’s open guard. That was so freakin’ close. Amir’s face is wide open. CB has brutal elbows and punches. CB waits patiently before packing rough punches and elbows. CB holds Amir’s face down with his right hand as he drops bombs with his left. More elbows. Amir must be thinking about his missed submission. Mazzagatti calls for action. Are you effin’ kidding me? They are doing plenty. Somebody immediately tells Mazzagatti to stand them up. CB continues nailing strikes in Amir. Amir stays busy from the bottom and is trying to switch up the guard. He is looking for arms. After a CB elbow Mazzagatti stands them up. They circle. Amir has a lazy leg kick and misses a huge overhand right. He fires in with front kicks and overhands before a clinch. CB gets the better of the clinch with knees. Clinch breaks. Amir has a front kick to the body. Amir throws a punch to the head but CB ducks and  CB shoots and takes Amir down. Open guard. Amir has a head lock. CB gets in a few elbows. End of round. Mazzagatti did not call for doctor to check out the cuts once.

– Amir’s deep cut is below Amir’s right eye. They touch gloves. CB circles. Amir closes in. Amir feints. CB leg kicks. Amir rushes in with punches to the head and kicks the body. CB clinches and has Amir against the cage. Amir has a headlock. He controls CB. CB is putting everything he has into a slam. Amir has defended for thirty seconds before CB succeeds. Full mount. Mazzagatti commands CB to let go of the fence. Hooks are in on Amir’s back. CB has a neck around Amir’s throat. Amir turns into CB’s choke and stays alive. Amir has an arm but CB pulls it out. Amir has CB’s head trapped with his legs and a toehold on CB as well. Very funky position. Tough to do in minute 18 of a fight. CB’s head is out. Amir tries to wrap his legs around CB again. Nearly has a head triangle. The guard is very tight. CB stretches Amir’s left arm. CB gives it up. Amir’s right leg is on the fence. CB’s head is deep inside Amir’s guard. Amir has a triangle on CB’s head. Amir has his arms on CB’s left arm and straightens it out. CB tumbles. Mazzagatti screams to stop the fight. It’s over. Amir screams like a monkey as he runs around the cage. Holy crap. What a fight. Minute 19.

– Dana said the fight was awesome. It was everything he thought it was going to be except that he thought CB would win. Amir takes brutal shots for his third fight in a row. CB admits to underestimating Amir. Dana quotes Jeff Probst and says Amir dug deep. The finale will be Jesse and Amir. The most unusual pair because I have not heard of either fighter. This is the first finale with two unknown names to me.

– Jesse will train his butt off for the finale. He has a good feeling and that it will hit him tonight. He feels awesome. The lights go out in the gym. We hear a chain close. We see random flashes of Las Vegas fade in and out like at the beginning of the SNES video game EarthBound where you see the spaceships intro flash into focus more and more rapidly. A sphinx. A hotel. The MGM Grand. What the bleep is going on? The image lands on a Las Vegas streetlight.

DANA: When the fighters leave the show I take them on a night on the town. We go out to dinner we go out to clubs.

This behind-the-scenes footage was never shown in any of the other seasons. Why are we being shown it here? Hmmmm. Why not just give us typical house footage prior to the final fight or have the sixteen fighters reflect on their journey? This is highly irregular.

DANA: The UFC’s home is here in Las Vegas.

It’s really Colorado but okay.

DANA: So I tell them to act appropriate. Have as much fun as you want but lets be cool. Then there were like four or five of them who decided to stay another night.

Uh oh.

DANA: I got a call from Palace Station security. I sent our security guy over there and he came back with some footage.

– We see Dana watch footage of a parking lot on his TV screen. However Dana is seated adjacent to the TV so it appears impossible for Dana to see the screen from his angle. It was all for the cameras. The footage shows of what happened the night before. We see glass break. Commercial.

– Dana is watching the monitor. He has a hand on his chin. Serious. Open mouthed. A limo pulls into a parking lot. A blurred face walks to the passenger door. They open the door. Glass breaks. The driver runs around to the other side of the passenger doors to where the window broke. A guy exits the limo. The driver looks inside the limo and then chases down a guy.

DANA: Apparently Jesse Taylor and a couple of the guys rented a limo and they were staying at the Palace Station Hotel. They came in at about three o’ clock in the morning and when the limo pulled into the valet, Jesse Taylor kicked the window out of the limousine. If that wasn’t bad enough then he went into the hotel and started terrorizing some of the female guests. And when he was approached by security he started flipping out and getting hostile with them. Basically telling them “you know who I am? I am a UFC fighter”.

Oh boy. A UFC fighter? Where’s the contract, buddy? His season hasn’t even aired yet. He should be keeping his nose ultra clean. Once you have the contract then do all of the Tank Abbott and Harold Howard s— you want.

DANA: And that s— don’t cut it.

We see the broken glass yet again.

DANA: So what I’m gonna do now is I’m gonna bring Rampage and Forrest back down to the gym here. I’m gonna sit em down and tell them what happened. Show them the video and tell them what I’m gonna do.

– Forrest and Rampage watch the footage. None of them are smiling. Forrest visibly cringes. Rampage is bewildered. Dana explains that he went to the bar and started terrorizing the female guests and yelled at security on top of the footage they just saw.

RAMPAGE: See that’s not a good move. At all.

Really?

– Rampage tells Dana that is not someone who can represent Dana’s company. Dana says it is terrible for the sport and the show.

I bet the ratings were sky high for the show though. Seriously. A guy who is about to win a six-figure contract blasts windows and terrorizes a hotel after he went through four fights? My goodness.

DANA: I told these guys what we expected of them and whether they’re in the UFC or not it’s just not the way you act.

No kidding.

– Jesse comes in. He smiles and shakes everyone’s hands. Dana asks what’s up.

DANA: Talk to me.
JESSE (in gangsta hat and d—-y gear): What’s up?
DANA (smile): Tell me what happened when you went out.
JESSE: Ummmm. . .drank a little too much.
DANA: And what?
JESSE: Uhhhhhh. . .drank a little too much and got a little rowdy.
DANA: This is my town, bro.

This is your town? Geez. Are you Howard Hughes or Michael Corleone? Geez. This is the UFC. Not the Russian M1 fight league.

DANA: I know f—ing everything that goes on and I gave you the speech before you left. How you needed to conduct yourself. It’s one thing to be in the house and bust up the house and have fun but when you get back out in the f—ing real world you go to jail for that s—.

You mean you can’t crack the railing at hotels and throw basketball hoops at high schools off of the roof? That’s expecting too much of society. Oh, and Jesse fires a very mean and demented look.

DANA (confessional): These guys are not UFC fighters yet. They’re trying to become UFC fighters, and you know, what I’ve seen from Jesse Taylor outside of the gym here? He’s not a guy I’m interested in having here at our organization.

DANA: What you’ve done here in the last two days shows me you’re not f—ing mentally ready to be in the f—ing UFC. Bro, you’re not even f—ing famous yet! What the f— are you gonna be like when you start making money and everybody wants your f—ing autograph and all of the girls wanna f—ing hang out with you. What’s gonna happen to you? You’re gonna be a f—ing lunatic.

JESSE: no.

DANA: Yeah! You will! I saw f—ing glimpses of it over the last two days you were in Vegas. You’re not ready for this, dude. You’re not ready.

(Cue JESSE crying worse than Paul Bradley.)

JESSE: Aw f—.

DANA: Bottom line is you’re f—ing out bro. First time ever in seven seasons of Ultimate Fighter somebody gets kicked off after the show.

I love how Dana takes the aside to explain to us this record. Step aside Noah Inhofer, you’re no longer the most shameful contestant the show has ever had!

And remember when Dana was all smiles that the round of 32 would eliminate all poseurs and pu–ies? Well somebody won all four fights and made it to Final Two for the sole purpose of disproving Dana’s theory that had him grinning from ear to ear.

JESSE: Aw f—.

– Jesse gives a confessional. It’s the lowest moment of his life. Dana is looking at Jesse. Forrest has his head buried in his hands. Rampage is looking at his watch. Is the new A-Team casting yet?

JESSE: Sorry Forrest. I’m a f—ing f—er.

– Jesse knew people were rooting for him as the hero and underdog. His kids. He could have done it. It’s his whole life. He doesn’t know what to say. He curses some more. He doesn’t know what to tell people. He wants to disappear for a while. Well once the episode airs it will tell his family and kids what happened for him.

DANA: Thanks for fighting hard and giving everything you had. You gave it a good season. You’re physically ready you don’t come in here and fight with guys win but you’re from being mentally and emotionally being ready for this. Believe me when I tell you to go home and get your f—ing life together. Don’t f—ing call me for a few months. Alright?

– Jesse cries and hugs Forrest and Rampage. Then shakes Dan’s hand then left the room. He cries some more. He hesitates to open the door as he takes the time to cry some more.

– Dana, Forrest, and Rampage all sit in the room silently. Dana looks confused. He informs us it is a really weird situation. They go on to make the best decision they could make.

– We switch to a shot of a plane flying into the desert. And another plane. One lone fighter enters. Commercial.

– We see the lone unknown fighter enter from the waist down. It’s Tim and CB. They are brought back and enter the office. Dana sits them down. Before doing so Dana tells us these two will fight each other and the winner will face Amir.

DANA: I’ve got some good news and bad news for you. Which do you want first?

– Both ask for bad news.

– Dana tells them JT is out. Both are shocked. Dana explains to us for the millionth time that it is the first time someone is kicked off after the show is over. CB does a double take. Tim looks like he knows. Dana says the good news is the two fight each other. Then he proceeds to ask if they want to do it. CB and Tim are both ecstatic to do it. Tim says they talked about fighting for each other for six weeks and were bummed they didn’t get to fight each other.

– Rampage is happy that the team is resurrected and back in this. He brags in front of a frowning Forrest.

– We fast forward to three weeks later. It’s fight day. Forrest tapes up Tim. A car comes in. It’s Amir. Amir has been training all this time. Dana waits by the door. Amir has yet to know about what happened to Jesse.

AMIR: I come back here. Memories flood back. I see Dana’s car. I see an ambulance. Then I wonder what’s going on.

Don’t ambulances follow UFC fighters everywhere?

DANA: You know why you’re here?
AMIR: Cause you guys miss me?
DANA: Yeah, we missed you very much. We’re here for a fight today.
AMIR: Uh wha?
DANA: Jesse Taylor is out.
AMIR: Is he alright?
DANA: No he’s not alright. He went on a rampage (no pun intended) like a lunatic. And uh he’s out he’s off the show.
(AMIR mouth twists.)
DANA: So today you and I (and a camera and sound crew and judges and a referee and cornermen) will watch CB and Tim fight today to see who moves on to see you in the finals. Welcome back.

– Both guys warm up with their respective coaches. Smallest crowd I have seen. The idea of it being the most important fight of their lives is reignited. Commercial.

– Rock music plays. Slow rock music like from Rock n’ Roll Racing.

TIM CREDEUR / BREAUX BRIDGE, LOUISIANA / 10-2
CB DOLLAWAY / TEMPE, ARIZONA / 6-0

– Even though Dana was in the centre of the octagon his speech is not shown (probably because he didn’t have time to rehearse it) and Mazzagatti tells them to bring it on.

– They touch gloves. We are shown merely highlights. They trade punches and kicks. Tim’s jiu jitsu was too good for CB to wish to take Tim down. Tim dropped CB at the end of the round and everyone figures the round could go either way. In round two there was a CB takedown and set up good combinations. Tim is getting tagged. Tim turtles. Mazzagatti closes in but doesn’t stop it. Tim gets back up. CB shoots and takes Tim down. There is no doubt CB won round two. In round three CB landed good combos and took Tim down. Tim launched leg kicks. Both trade. Dana had Tim winning the third round. Amir thought it was one of the better fights. Then why couldn’t we see it?!

– The winner by unanimous decision and advancing to face Amir is CB Dollaway. Tim says he was Forrest’s first pick and CB was Rampage’s first pick and the fight lived up to the hype. What hype? We found out about it ten minutes ago and no one except the twenty people in the gym were able to see it in its entirety.

– CB and Amir square off. Rampage is excited CB and Amir will have a re-match. Rampage revitalizes his evil laugh.

– Promo time for the June 21st live finale. It’s the smack-talking bruiser versus the never say die warrior. the main event will have season 3 winner Kendall Grove take on Bear Hugger Evan Tanner. Two weeks later Rampage and Forrest will go to war for the hotly contested light heavyweight championship. Shweet. Who will win the title of ultimate fighter?

MIDDLEWEIGHTS

TEAM RAMPAGE

BRANDON SENE 0
CB DOLLAWAY 9
DANIEL CRAMER 0
GERALD HARRIS 0
JEREMY MAY 0
MATTHEW RIDDLE 0
MIKE DOLCE 0
PATRICK SCHULTZ 0

TEAM FORREST

AMIR SADOLLAH 7
CALE YARBROUGH 0
DAHTE RIVERA 0
JESSE TAYLOR 6
LUKE ZACHRICH 0
MATT BROWN 0
NICK KLEIN 0
TIM CREDEUR 4

Rank the fights

1) Dan Simmler vs. Matthew Riddle (Guys? What happened? Which episode are we on? Did these two fight? I can’t remember if they fought. They didn’t fight? Was it an amateur bout? Was it real? F— you, Rampage tell me what happened!)

2) CB Dollaway vs. Amir Sadollah I (What. A. War.

3) Amir Sadollah vs. Matt Brown (Rock em sock em robots in the octagon. Both have excellent chins. I have never seen fighters survive so many doggone knees. The ground game was highly technical prior to Amir locking on the submission.)

4) Matthew Riddle vs. Tim Credeur (The pace was great. There was some decent striking. Excellent back and forth on the ground. No idea who would win either. Tim pulled out the submission with only 50 seconds left in the fight to avoid a Cecil Peoples scorecard. Awesome.)

5) Gerald Harris vs. Amir Sadollah (Gerald engineers the biggest slams ever seen on TUF. Sure there was a bit too much holding but Amir’s striking and scrambling that concludes with a KO by a knee to the chin makes this fight worth viewing again and again.)

6) CB Dollaway vs. Nick Klein (Numerous sweeps and submission attempts. Striking on the feet. It’s too bad Nick tapped out so quickly at the end.)

7) Josh Hall vs. Matt Brown (An incredible pace. Both guys gave it their all. Submission attempts, slams, kicks, punches, grappling. Funky positions on the ground. Another one of Rampage’s friends goes down. The unknown Cincinnati Kid takes it all with a really smart game plan. Best fight of the first two episodes beside the outrageous knockout.)

8) Jeremy May vs. Matt Brown (Jeremy May acts like a jack— all season. His cardio is terrible. He appears that he may beat Matt Brown after all. But then the pain comes. And a sweet head kick KO.)

9) Daniel Cramer vs. Luke Zachrich (A fight where fatigue was a factor. Both of these guys deserve credit for taking a bunch of knees and nasty hits before Luke had zero energy left in him and let Daniel win.)

10) Daniel Cramer vs. Tim Credeur (They started off striking. Cramer was uh sweepin, but then Credeur got on top and Cramer was uh beaten. Pretty boy tapped to a telegraphed heel hook.)

11) Cale Yarbrough vs. John Clarke (Excellent grappling match-up. Dropping seventeen pounds in one day can really affect your fighting ability.)

12) Tim Credeur vs. Erik Charles (Erik’s claim to being the fastest guy is debunked as Tim’s slick black belt jiu jitsu travels at rocket speed to successfully take Erik down and submit him within about thirty seconds. Great lessons to be taught from Tim’s technique.)

13) Brandon Sene vs. Dante Rivera (‘Twas a fine grappling match for a good chunk of it. Fights going to the third round avoid BS decisions. For the most part. Unfortunately this fight should have been a draw in round three and go to a fourth round. Oh well. It triggered Rampage flipping over s—.)

14) CB Dollaway vs. Cale Yarbrough (A fight all of us will forget by the end of the season. It was the quarterfinals. CB got Cale to the ground after about a minute. Strikes. Full mount. More strikes. Referee stoppage. End scene.)

15) Patrick Schultz vs. Cale Yarbrough (Neither fighter knew what to do on the ground. A few strikes traded until Cale decides to take Patrick down halfway through the first round and continue to do so until the end of the fight.

16) Luke Zachrich vs. Patrick Schultz (Great technique by both fighters except with Patrick taking himself down despite having the under hooks.)

17) Prince McLean vs. Mike Dolce (An overall good match I s’pose. Striking and grappling proves both of them were very capable of making it into the house.)

18) Tim Credeur vs. Jesse Taylor (At least Tim was bucking and Jesse looked to finish the fight in the third round. Although all that occurred is a decision like everyone knew it would be. Oh well.)

19) Steve Byrnes vs. Amir Sadollah (A slow war of attrition before Amir pulls out the victory/the arm.)

20) Nick Rossborough vs. Jesse Taylor (There was a guy who somewhat resembled Slim Shady and possessed a Boston Rob accent. That’s about it.)

21) Jeremy May vs. Dave Roberts (Nothing noteworthy about this early bout. Rampage loses a dear friend.)

22) Mike Dolce vs. Jesse Taylor (Jesse could have finished the fight so much earlier. Or be more aggressive with his excellent position. Same goes for Dolce in the few instances when he had the dominating spot.)

23) Dante Rivera vs. Jesse Taylor (Jesse’s third showing and my goodness it is worse than ever. Snoozer. Heavyweight fights in TUF 2 have more action than a Jesse fight.)

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