TAR 6 episode 4 ranking

Fourth leg

Previously on TAR: Teams traveled to Sweden to continue a Viking theme for the third episode in a row. Teams used shotglasses made of ice while Gus & Hera were lost in the dark (that was a highlight? Really?), but their teamwork propelled them out of last place. A counting detour baffled Bolo who thought seventy comes after sixty-eight, and made Don be Jack Bauer. At the roadblock Victoria heaved. Lena could not find a clue after ten hours in hay bales because producers are dumb. Who will be eliminated next?

– Intro time. Seven out of eight teams are couples. God help us all. Well, hopefully Jonathan & Victoria can last to the very end.

– Phil introduces us to Stockholm. and says it’s beautiful. All teams are hanging out on a ship. Will frontrunners Hayden & Aaron and Kris & Jon continue to outwit and outpace the other teams? And can Don & Mary Jean keep up with the younger, faster (and I would add smarter) teams. Hayden & Aaron, who arrived at 2:04pm, depart at 2:04am while Lena is still unrolling bales of hay. Next clue sits at the top of Town Hall Tower. Kris & Jon leave one minute behind . They travel together.

– The fourth leg with a task in the Viking region? Is this TAR Asia where they only travel to countries in one lone continent? This season is repeating the same mistake TAR 4 did of hanging around in Europe for too long. For some reason seasons that skip South America and instead head into urban central/northern Europe has never proven to have a fascinating start. The tower does not open until 10:00am so they get a room at the Sheraton. Two rooms. Nothin’ funky going on here.

– Over an hour later Gus & Hera depart. Jonathan & Victoria are next. They say all of their problems have been with each other as opposed to the race. Victoria describes it as a vicious cycle. They work with Gus & Hera. So much for Gus’ leg one plans to knock out Jonathan as his first target. They are told tower is not open until ten so they sleep.

– The sun is out. Adam & Rebecca depart at 5:37am. Just think if Lena did not have bad luck she would have been at the pit stop over two hours before them.

REBECCA: Believe it or not when I met Adam he didn’t even cut his own toe nails believe it or not. His mom did. I was like ‘if you’re gonna be my boyfriend, you have to cut your own toenails.’

So demanding.

Adam admits he lives at home. Hey, there’s no shame in that Adam. You’re not alone. They see the gate which says it is open at SEVEN in the morning.

Here is what I think happened: The tower is open at ten o’ clock in the morning. However this changed when Stockholm City Council got wind of TAR coming and wished to use the Tower as a route marker. Immediately they agreed the tower would be open at seven so racers would not be congested with the locals. Why else would the locals universally agree it opened at ten despite it being a major landmark in town? It’s the only reasoning that makes sense.

– Adam & Rebecca say it is 6:05am so they will sit at the tower. Freddy & Kendra depart at 6:09am. They say something boring and get to the tower. They wonder where the other teams are. Meanwhile the four leading teams fall to the end of the pack as they casually wake up. Adam & Rebecca and Freddy & Kendra find it extremely bizarre that teams three to four hours ahead of you have not made it to a nearby route marker. If I were them I would expect an ambush at the top of the tower.

– Adam reaches the top. Fly to Dakar, Senegal. YAY! New continent baby. Production wasn’t as stubborn as they were in TAR 4. Adam figures it on his own that Senegal is in Africa. The clue is sitting outside of the airport. Kendra is upset they are taking a forty minute taxi to the airport that will cost fifty bucks when the driver admits train would be faster. Freddy tries to say that the train would be stressful while this cab ride is relaxing. Kendra yells at him for not wanting to spend money on a hotel (didn’t they have thirty minutes before the tower opened?).

– Adam introduces Rebecca’s Bolo impression.

I think this is closer to resembling the witch from Robin Hood Men In Tights rather than Bolo. Cue Lori & Bolo’s departure from the pit stop at 7:52am. Bolo says they are closer together and are working together better than the start of the race. Nobody is doing the ‘I am better than you are’. One minute later and Don & Mary Jean leave. This means Lena searched hay bales five hours longer than Don did. Ugh. Okay. I’ve moved past it. New day.

– Don says this is a new round and they are going to come out fighting. Gus & Hera came to the route marker early and are surprised it opened at seven. It’s good they are early. Jonathan & Victoria pull out their binoculars and see people at the top of the tower.

VICTORIA: How did they get up there if it doesn’t open til ten?

I don’t know, Victoria. Any answers to solve this mystery?

– Freddy & Kendra have made up over four hour disadvantage. They are on an 11:20am Air France flight. Adam & Rebecca are on the same flight and the four of them discuss what happened to the other four teams. Maybe they are rooting for your success like you are John Carroll.

– Hayden & Aaron and Kris & Jon stroll the streets together. Victoria reaches the top of the tower as she reads the next clue. Her and Jonathan enter a cab

The Slap. Cab Driver looks at his hat instead of his eyes. Is that a cultural thing?

JONATHAN: Why aren’t you going?

What? Red means Stop in Sweden? It isn’t like that in America! Cultural differences, oh my.

Hmph. He’s such a stickler about red lights.

– Lori & Bolo are fifth. Don & Mary Jean are sixth. Don is happy they have been practicing stairs. I know, eh? Stairs are so dang tricky. How does one ascend those things? You raise your legs? What crazy bizz is this? In China they master the art of Traversing the Stair at the Shaolin Temple.

– Aaron comments on the weather and wants to check on the tower for the heck of it. Him and Hayden panic as they see the sign and run up the tower immediately. As I said before this has been the least competitive group of racers.

– Kris & Jon wonder why Hayden & Aaron are in such a hurry as they run away from the tower. Hayden gives them the piece of information that the place is indeed open. These two trailing teams are the only two teams to get onto the subway. All other teams had paid for a cab. Gus & Hera and Lori & Bolo are also on the 11:20am flight.

– Jonathan & Victoria are on an 11:10am flight. Did they really find the best flight? Oh wait. This flight is the earliest one to Paris but in Paris everyone connects on the same flight. Jonathan thinks he is the only one on this flight and merely wants to give the illusion to other racers that he has the best flight. As I’ve said before, he is such a little kid at heart.

– Don & Mary Jean are on the 11:20am flight. These six teams all board their planes. Hayden & Aaron and Kris & Jon have gone from nearly a six hour lead on the trailing teams to potentially being several hours behind themselves. Hayden & Aaron and Kris & Jon make the flight. This is the fourth leg in a row where there is a major equalizer for all remaining teams after the first clue.

– We are in Senegal at 7:55pm. Production films a great overhead shot. This is as wild as an airport gets.

I have circled Jonathan in yellow. He pulls on a door that does not open. Note how he is several steps ahead of everyone else. Sitting on a plane has stored all of his energy.

Jonathan sees Victoria keep running and keeps up with her. Both of them are hyper as if they are ahead of two roided up athletes in a foot race.

Out of my way teammate I need to catch a cab that requires you to be in it!

– Teams open up the clue. They must figure out who wrote the enclosed poem and go to their tomb. The poem belongs to influential literary writer and ex-Senegalese president Leopold Sedar Senghor. From here go to Senghor’s cave ten miles away.

– Gus & Hera try to get into a cab but a local tells them to find another cab. They eventually find one. Kris & Jon get into a cab first. Lori & Bolo and Adam & Rebecca figure out they need to go to Bel-Air cemetery.

– Jonathan & Victoria ask some shop window about the poem. Victoria talks to them calmly while Jonathan, unable to speak French, tries to mime the act of being dead and buried so that the French speaking locals understand. By the way, as someone who took French 11 and French 12, the word for dead is mort. Advice for future racers who are required to find graves.

Charades Master. . .if he were trying to mime the Silas Screws picture on Survivor Sucks message boards.

– They attempt to catch a cab. Jonathan asks for somebody who speaks English. The guy hops into the cab with them.

ADAM: So far Africa sucks. Dakar is by far and away the worst and most nightmarish place I’ve been to in my life.

Oddly enough replace ‘Africa’ with ‘summer camp’ and you have a statement that Adam says on the first day of any new place that he goes to. His mommy or daddy are too far away to pick him up if he gets homesick though.

Not impressed by Adam’s comments.

You know what would make you feel better Adam and calm your nerves?

A head of bananas. C’mon. It’ll bring a smile to your face. Oddly enough Rebecca is not a big fan of eating nor swallowing bananas. By the way, even I have a banana hat.

– Bolo struggles figuring out where to go. Finally a cab tells him ‘no problem’. Freddy & Kendra complains about the smell.

KENDRA: This is craziness so far.
FREDDY: It’s mayhem. I can’t believe that airport, I can’t believe the people. The whole thing seems unsafe.

– You should see the Mumbai airport, Freddy. You would have a meltdown in TAR 1, 4, or 5 when they go to India. And do you care to elaborate by when you say ‘I can’t believe the people?’ Pretty please? 😀

– Hayden, a fellow mactor, says the place is gross. Mary Jean puts a hand on the cab’s shoulder amidst the chaos.

In Mary Jean’s defense she wasn’t patting the top of your head. I do like that Mary Jean goes from a warm smile to quivering in fear during the request. If I were the cab driver I wouldn’t want old people germs touching me either.

– Freddy & Kendra’s cab pulls over to put air in tires.
FREDDY: We don’t have time for gas.
CABBIE: No problem.

Every response is ‘no problem’ with tourists no matter the situation. It takes me back to last season when Brandon & Nicole accused the man in Tanzania of being untrustworthy and the guy calmly said ‘no problem’ to every statement until Nicole threw the money on the ground.

Isn’t that the sweetest get-up you’ve ever seen?

The biggest trend in Senegalese fashion in 2004.

Victoria instructs the cab to go fast. Vite means fast in French. Jonathan takes a stab at speaking French.

And Jonathan fails his high school language requirement. Better luck next year, Jonathan.

– Don & Mary Jean have a flat tire. Mary Jean says ‘We have a flat tire’ in a flustered voice. It becomes out of place when the same soundbyte is played multiple times.

DON: Once again the fickle finger of fate has diddled us.

The last time the fickle finger of fate diddled me was when I was studying under a priest.

– Everyone is whining about the smell, chaos, and uncertainty. Jonathan is the most tolerant as he tells Victoria he does not want to lose because she is fearful of the place in the world where they are. I find it tough to hate people who are overall accepting of people who are different. Or are we so different? Kendra is disgusted by the smell.

KENDRA: What are we? Driving through sewage?

KRIS: I find it enlightening.

– Everyone gets to the cemetery. It does not open until 730am. Another unnecessary equalizer. Since when do cemeteries close at night? That goes against everything I know about Halloween stories. Freddy attempts to stiff the taxi and say he will only pay five dollars because he did not want to stop to fill the car with tires. I wonder what happened to the last guy who tried to stiff a taxi for stopping to repair the car?

Oh. Yeah. I remember that.

KENDRA: This is not safe. We are in the middle of Ghetto Africa.

I didn’t know whether or not to capitalize the ‘G’. The way Kendra used it makes it sound like a region of the continent. Ah yes. The Sahara Desert, the SubSahara, Egypt (which according to Chip is not part of Africa), Kilimanjaro, then finally Ghetto Africa. Ah yes. By the way this was when I became anti-Freddy & Kendra. I am not like my mom or sister who are critical of TV characters within the first couple episodes. I give them plenty of chances and understand their perspective (see Jonathan, Colin & Christie, Colton Cumbie, Sean Rector, Corinne Kaplan, and Kelly & Jon). But this right here is about as ignorant as remarks get. However we must not forget this is episode four of an edited show and a long gruelling race. Kendra may regret these comments.

– The teams all find the cemetery. Kris & Jon are last to the cemetery but are relieved they are the ones to benefit from an equalizer. All eight teams are at the same hotel. Morning comes. It’s D-Day for them. Eight teams are inside the cemetery when it opens at 730am.

And a dog. How cute. Lead us to Senghor’s grave, Fido!

– JONATHAN: Ejal. You from Africa, me from America. Power.

Victoria is not impressed because the other seven teams are piling into the cemetery while Jonathan is too busy fist-bumping the locals into cooperation. This is the infamous The Fist- Bump incident.

– Kendra is creeped out by the idea of walking across a grave to catch up with Freddy. Graves in “Ghetto Africa” are twenty percent creepier to Kendra. Bolo is first to the clue. They must go to Kayar Fishing Village. Gus & Hera and Don & Mary Jean find it next and walk away quietly to evade detection by other teams. They succeed. Victoria finds it. They are in the cab with Ejal. Adam & Rebecca find it next. Freddy & Kendra, Hayden & Aaron, and Kris & Jon follow.

– Freddy asks his cab how much it will cost. Thirty bucks. I wonder if Freddy thinks he can stiff a cab for the second day in a row? Lori & Bolo are first there. Cab wants sixty. They pay forty and walk away without incident. So do Gus & Hera. Don & Mary Jean comment on how high the local’s spirits are despite not seeing poverty quite like this.

– Jonathan & Victoria get to clue box first. Detour time. Stack Em Up or Pull Em Up. In Stack Em Up, teams walk to fish stacking area then carry enough baskets of fish to the work area to properly cover a drying table.

That’s a lot of fish.

– In Pull Em Up they will go into a fishing boat with a captain and use traditional fishing line to catch four fish. Then bring it back to shore where a man will give them their next clue. Jonathan asks Ejal which would be easier. He says to stack. Hera nearly runs over a ‘baaing’ sheep on the way to the clue. Don is behind her and Lori accidentally runs into Don to the clue box.

– Jonathan stops to hand out candy to about ten kids before they commence the detour. He thinks they have a great heart and are so innocent. Victoria knows Jonathan wants children so bad and thinks he’ll be a great father.

JONATHAN: I would love to have a baby. We’ve already picked out the names.

Not a typical confessional you hear on TAR.

– STACK EM UP: Jonathan & Victoria, Lori & Bolo
PILE EM UP: Gus & Hera, Don & Mary Jean

The other cabs arrive. Freddy’s cab driver requests forty. Freddy pays him thirty. The driver is frustrated and walks alongside Kendra. She said nobody told them to pay forty. I have to apologize to Freddy & Kendra here. When this episode aired I thought Freddy was merely wishing to stiff the Senegalese drivers because they are from “Ghetto Africa”. The first cab stiff I do think was wrong. This second incident I am on Freddy’s side. I never noticed that the cab driver told them a lower number at the start of the journey but then increased it at the end.

– STACK EM UP: Jonathan & Victoria, Lori & Bolo, Adam & Rebecca, Freddy & Kendra, Kris & Jon
PILE EM UP: Gus & Hera, Don & Mary Jean

– The Pile Em Up teams hit the waters. The waters should be pretty smooth.

What is this? A boat chase straight out of James Bond?

– The cab driver follows them.
FREDDY: You have plenty. You got enough for one full day of work. I don’t want to hear anymore. That’s enough.
KENDRA: You make that more in one day than you do in a whole year.

!!!!!!!!!!!!! Apology withdrawn.

– The cab driver follows Freddy & Kendra to stacking fish. A local eventually takes the driver away from them and brushes him away.

– Hera and Don are both seasick. Mary Jean said they started catching fish when Don began puking.

– Jonathan & Victoria are first to complete the detour. Jonathan tries to kiss the clue lady on the lips but she turns and he lands on the cheek. Next clue takes them to Lac Rose. Them and Ejal are still inside the cab.

– Kris & Jon leap to second place.
REBECCA: Kris & Jon are done.
ADAM: Good for them.

Heh. Rebecca’s commentating career is over.

– Mary Jean talks about how Don is seasick and does not want her to talk about it. Luckily there isn’t a logic roadblock. Freddy & Kendra are in third and get into a cab. Will they stiff their third consecutive cab?

– Jonathan & Victoria see the mounds of salt. Roadblock time. In this roadblock the person will have to use a traditional shovel and basket, head into the pink lake, and scoop salt from the lake’s floor and put it into the basket. Bring the basket to shore and pour the salt into a larger basket. Once the basket has been filled with 25 gallons, the team will receive their next clue.

A pink lake. How cool is that? It looks like a lake made of grapefruit juice or Kool-Aid but it’s really from the high concentration of Sodium Chloride.

– Lori & Bolo finish detour. So do Adam & Rebecca. The two teams doing the fish catching are in the last two positions. Kris & Jon went to the wrong place. Freddy & Kendra’s actions have catapulted them into second place. Hayden & Aaron are there too. Kendra is doing the roadblock.

KENDRA: Is this sanitary? Why is the water red? First thing that came to my mind is maybe it’s blood.

Believe it or not Kendra this is where the expression ‘blood diamond’ comes from. All of “Ghetto Africa’s” natural resources are literally bathing in blood. The salt in your food, pearls, the diamond on your finger, all of it is produced thanks to blood. That’s why there is such a big AIDS problem.

– Kendra tries to use the salt on the boat but Freddy says she has to use the salt in the water. Aaron instructs Hayden that she can’t use the salt on the boat either. They have to get wet whether they like it or not. Kris’ team is there and doing the roadblock. So is Lori. Adam is doing it and does not understand what to do. Lori is balancing the basket on her head and is met with applause by the Senegalese audience. Jon comments on how sexually appealing Kris is during the task. Adam whines about not being able to see. Rebecca has to dab his eyes with a towel and spanks his butt telling him to go faster. Geez. She is his mother. Kendra is complaining about not being able to see either.

– Jonathan is done. Pit stop time. Take a ferry to Ile de Goree. For more than three hundred years this island was a prison where slaves were held before heading to the New World. Teams must search the streets for the pit stop. Last team to check in may be eliminated.

Why is the camera so low? Victoria is spaced out and Ejal has on some epic shades.

REBECCA: Adam you’re a man! You’ve gotta be better than the girls doing this. You’re stronger than that.
ADAM: My back hurts Rebecca so SHUT UP! Just shut up. Shut up.
REBECCA: . . . . .I should’ve done this one.

Adam channels his inner Christina Cha.

– Kris is done. She defeated nearly everyone. Gus & Hera just finished the detour. They exit. Don & Mary Jean finish well after they leave. Lori is done. Bolo describes it as ‘freakin a– kickin’. Hayden finishes and wonders why Kris beat all of them so bad. Kendra is done next.

REBECCA: Slow and steady you don’t want to drop it.
ADAM: Rebecca,  shut up. I swear to god Rebecca–
REBECCA: Lori and Adam started at the same time. It’s baffling. That’s a girl.

Uhhhh, that’s a bit insulting and sexist. The thing with physical tasks on TAR is that you expect a male to win because their testosterone capacity is, on average, larger than a female’s capacity. Lori I would say has more testosterone in her body than Adam. Maybe one day you will not always think in binaries, Rebecca. But I do agree that Adam is whiny and should have finished earlier.

– Traffic is piling up. Jonathan & Victoria and Kris & Jon are concerned. Kris’ team pleas work as the cabbie is more than willing to weave in and out of traffic. Do you know how this was filmed in 2004?

Because he is filmed driving while talking on his cell phone for national television. All cabs keep saying to push through the traffic. One of the cabs replies ‘no problem’.

– Adam does the roadblock. He hates being called physically weak. Rebecca says nobody would say that if he would stop being a ‘wussy boy’.

– Gus & Hera are at roadblock. Gus is doing it. He takes the salt off the boats. Hera has to scream multiple times for Gus to hear that he is breaking a rule. He eventually listens and digs the salt out of the water. Kris & Jon  are first to ferry. The cab trunk for Jonathan’s cab does not open right away. The delay is so long that Kris & Jon are alone on the first ferry. Now it’s Hayden & Aaron, Lori & Bolo, Adam & Rebecca, Jonathan & Victoria, and Freddy & Kendra. This is too big of an equalizer only moments away from a pit stop.

– Gus is nearly done. Mary Jean volunteers to do the roadblock because Don is way too sick and is vomiting.

– Adam & Rebecca tend to fight on public forms of transportation.
ADAM: You’re just so unsupportive right now.
REBECCA: I feel like I was supportive the whole time during that.

Let’s flashback to a cab ride two minutes ago.

Ah. Right. She was supportive.

REBECCA: The whole time you were screaming at me I was like ‘Baby, you’re doing great’ and you were like ‘SHUT UP!’
ADAM: I was ready to hurt you. I couldn’t see like do you think I’m faking it.
REBECCA: You know what? You’re on your own.
ADAM: Do you think I’m faking that my back hurts?
REBECCA: I don’t have time to babysit my girlfriend anymore.

Judging by this photo I’d say Rebecca won that argument. What is Adam’s counter?

Dang. Four episodes in and Adam has proven to be more suicidal than Sean Kingston when he sees ‘beautiful girls’. At least Adam is resourceful. Whether it be train tracks or salty lakes, Adam is ready with a contingency plan when he feels attacked.

It would. Film it and put it on YouTube. The fact he looks like Hellboy will bank you a million views guaranteed. Two million if he yells ‘I love you mom’ over and over as he is doing it. Three million if Rebecca does a voiceover and says he does not clip his own toenails. Also, Rebecca is clearly not taking Adam seriously at this stage. This relationship was over in Norway if you ask me.

– Kris & Jon are at pit stop. They are first. Seven night cruise so no need for me to guess the adjective that Phil will use. Mary Jean pretends to make Lori wrestler sounds as she dumps salt into the basket. Don is crying because Mary Jean collecting salt is a source of proud achievement. The crowd applauds her.

– Ejal is still with Jonathan & Victoria. Dang. They managed to get a guide through three cab rides and a ferry ride. Now the guy has to take a ferry back to Dakar. How much did they pay him I wonder? Lori & Bolo are third. Hayden & Aaron fourth. Freddy & Kendra fifth. Adam & Rebecca sixth. Rebecca even kisses him. It’s between Gus & Hera and Don & Mary Jean. Gus & Hera are on the ferry and manage to proceed without Don & Mary Jean. It appears a full ferry ride ahead means Gus & Hera should have no problem securing seventh. They have not found Phil when Don & Mary Jean’s ferry arrives. Little suspense as Gus & Hera are indeed seventh. Ominous music plays as Don & Mary Jean land on the mat. They are so done. Phil says they’re last.
But it’s a non-elimination! Phil takes away their money and will not give them any money on the next leg. It is similar to most pension plans in this day and age. Don talks about how they’ve had a good run and are the oldest couple to make it this far. That means nothing because the Gutsy Grannies are the only team older than them to be cast for the race, and well, Gutsy Grannies aren’t exactly sparkling racers. Don speaks as if they have been eliminated.

Next time on TAR: Gus cries. Fight between Hayden & Aaron and Lori Bolo occurs. That is all. And if you thought some of Kendra’s quotes were completely out of line then wait until next episode. It is the absolute worst in twenty seasons.

P.S. Yes, this would be the earliest non-elimination leg for TAR at the time. Leg four? Is that really necessary? The reason why I have an issue with early non-eliminations is that the gimmicky/crappy teams will finish at the bottom of 90% of all legs and are incapable of making it to the end and winning. That’s  not to say they can use the non-elimination and get by on luck for a couple eliminations because of the mass number of teams, but they will be nowhere in the Final Three. In a season where the majority of teams are poor racers I would suggest to have the non-eliminations later than usual. Heck, I’d suggest a 4-4-3 structure and cut out a non-elimination leg so an elimination is freed up and we could have a Final Two.

So Don & Mary Jean are saved. A team that has failed to be better than 8th after FOUR legs landed a miracle. In fact they have finished in eighth three times in a row and that is including Lena pushing hay bales for ten hours to bump them up a spot. Can this mediocre team improve upon eighth or will they be eliminated next leg anyway? Or will a second consecutive non-elimination save the old couple? We shall see.

Adam&Rebecca 4.5
Don&Mary Jean 8.5
Freddy&Kendra 3.4
Gus&Hera 2.3
Hayden&Aaron 1.3
Jonathan&Victoria 4.2
Kris&Jon 2.3
Lori&Bolo 0.3

12th Debra & Steve 12.0
12th Gina & Sylvia 12.0
11th Team Seinfeld/Avi & Joe 11.0
11th Dennis & Erika 11.0
11th Deidre & Hilary 11.0
11th Matt & Ana 11.0
9th Peggy & Claire 9.0
10th Meredith & Maria 9.0
10th Dennis & Andrew 9.0 FF
10th Russell & Cindy 8.33
10th Kim & Leslie 8.0
9th Jim & Marsha 7.33
8th Dave & Margaretta 7.0
9th Lena & Kristy 7.0
10th Hope & Norm 7.0
6th Lenny & Karyn 6.43
7th Paul & Amie 6.2
8th Steve & Dave 6.2 FF
11th Amanda & Chris 6.0
6th Andre & Damon 5.86
5th Kami & Karli 5.8
8th Michael & Kathy 5.8
7th Cyndi & Russell 5.8

9th Heather & Eve 5.75
5th Nancy & Emily 5.67
10th Alison & Donny 5.5
6th Tian & Jaree 5.43 FF
7th Monica & Sheree 5.33 FF
7th Marshall & Lance 5.33
8th Bob & Joyce 5.25
7th Silver & Gold 5.17
9th Steve & Josh 5.0 – FF
9th Pat & Brenda 5.0 – FF
5th John Vito & Jill 4.8 – FF
2nd Teri & Ian 4.53 – FF
8th Shola & Doyin 4.25 – FF
4th Linda & Karen 4.17
6th Mary & Peach 4.14 (Two failed FF attempts.)
3rd David & Jeff 4.00 – FF
4th Oswald & Danny 4.00 – FF
5th Gary & Dave 3.89 – FF
2nd Kelly & Jon 3.85
4th Jon & Al 3.73
6th Charla & Mirna 3.71
3rd Blake & Paige 3.69 – FF
5th Millie & Chuck 3.67 FF
1st Chris & Alex 3.38 – FF
1st Chip & Kim 3.38
4th Kevin & Drew 3.36 – FF
3rd Brandon & Nicole 3.31
1st Reichen & DK 3.15 – FF
4th Derek & Drew 3.10 – FF
3rd Joe & Bill 2.76 – FF
2nd Tara & Wil 2.53 – FF
1st Flo & Zach 2.69 – FF
3rd Ken & Gerard 2.69 – FF
2nd Colin & Christie 2.54 – FF
1st Rob & Brennan – 2.46 FF
2nd Frank & Margarita 2.38 – FF

Rank The Teams

3) Meredith & Maria

Neither of them could drive a stick. Neither of them could follow directions. Neither of them could do any of the tasks well. The out of shape 70 year olds beat them in a physical task. They are good people, but production loses marks for not catching on that this team is incapable of doing virtually any tasks on the Race. Why cast them if you know they will need a miracle or an insane number of equalizers to survive each round?

2) Avi & Joe

They looked exactly like characters from Seinfeld. Avi had the potential to be one of the most polarizing players in TAR history. It is about as good cop/bad cop as a team could ever get in TAR. I must say it really was too bad that these two went home so early. Avi taunted at teams as he passed them in a car and Joe was a ‘nice guy’ to the others. We will forever question how their storyline would have played out if it wasn’t for a late leg error.

1) Lena & Kristy

They are the only all-female team in the past couple seasons to not talk about the ‘we need a female team to win!!!!1111oneoneone’ crap. Therefore, that alone made me be fans of theirs. They screwed up in the first couple legs but ran a nearly flawless third leg. However it was the same leg when production made its most poorly thought out roadblock in the history of TAR. I wish they would have let Lena find a clue before going onto the course and eliminating them. At least give her that satisfaction.

Rank the Legs

1) Reykavik -> Voss (I s’pose it was okay. There were a couple equalizers but at least they drove themselves all leg. Jonathan & Victoria carry this episode from start to finish with their antics. Adam’s ridiculousness persists with doing the roadblock, lost sunglasses, and jumping on train tracks. A pit stop penalty and old people stealing cars makes it a memorable one.

2) Chicago -> Reykavik (Errors, errors everywhere and not a team running flawless. This two hour premiere featured a secret alliance where two of the teams in the alliance finished tenth and eleventh. Nothing original as several equalizers occur and tasks are modeled after TAR 3, 4, and 5. It was okay I guess?

3) Stockholm -> Dakar (Taking mactors out of their comfort zone is always fun. The only episode where Jonathan comes off as the best cast member in an environment. His adventures with Ejal, Adam whining as he digs up salt, and Don puking into the water was fun. What wasn’t fun were the high number of equalizers and Kendra becoming the absolute least tolerant contestant out of all 114 people to run the race course. This leg would hold the record for earliest non-elimination for a really long time. It is for a good reason because all it did was keep a crappy team in longer.)

4) Voss -> Stockholm (F— you producers. Worst episode of all time.)

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