Day 36 — Favourite Juror
Diogo Almeida, Angie MacNeil, Brian Wildman, Francisco Grilo, Joey Pannullo, Rob Beasley, David Healy, Maxime Gauthier-LaFond, Aaron Conn, Clayton Spivey, Ryan Weiss, Sarah Casa, Daniel Knowles – Eliza Orlins (
ELIZA: Logan didn’t vote for me? *enormous eye roll*)
Ian O’ Brien, Nathan Miller (.5), Alex Jordan, Brenda Porter, Jason Bleau, Brett Watts, Mervin Sanding, – Susan Hawk (
SIOUX: Richard is a snake. Kelly is a rat. Snakes eat rats. I’m brilliant! Top 5 most memorable television moment is mine. Kelly will be humiliated, dehumanized, and totally spent after my speech. Nobody
COLLEEN: I’m not changing my mind. Kelly is awesome.
GERVASE: I’m switching my vote to Kelly because of your speech, Sue.
JENNA: I’m switching my vote to Kelly because of your speech, Sue.
RUDY: I’m voting for the openly male queer over the possibly in-closet female queer.
SEAN: We’re voting for a winner as opposed to a loser? Does that mean I have to reverse the alphabet strategy? Therefore, I vote Rich.
GREG: *rolls dice*
SIOUX: See? My speech made all the difference to help Rich win, eh?)
Nathan Miller (.5), Anne Curtis, James Wall, Julie Bentz – David Murphy (
JEFF: The jury will ask a question or make a comment to the three remaining players.
DAVID: I’m not.
JEFF: I can’t allow that. Rules are rules.
DAVID: I’m going to talk to the jury and list the 101 Reasons why Boston Rob should win Redemption Island.
DAVID: Future all-star lock. Can I haz a puzzle to not solve?)
Rosey Sigglekow, Nelson Escobar – Courtney Yates (You’re my girl. No, I’m you’re girl. No, you’re my girl. Fist buuuuump. Cha.)
Bobby Harvey, Logan Saunders, – Erik Cardona (The most convincing jury speech in the history of the game. Plain and simple. One of the most talked about jury speeches in a long time and essentially explains why Natalie, who gets to the end using the worst adaptation of the under-the-radar strategy in the show’s history, is crowned sole survivor in the end. It is a lesson for future players who want to study that how you put people on the jury is the only thing you need to care about over the course of 39 days. Not much else really matters.)
Phillip Scherer, Ben Nehls, – Corinne Kaplan (
CORINNE: Susie, if you say ‘yes’ to this question, I will give you a million dollars. If I give you my vote, will you get your vocal cords removed?
*BOB and SUGAR snicker*
CORINNE: Bob, I adore you. But you’re one-dimensional. I’ve seen nice Bob. Now I wanna see Nasty Bob.
VIEWERS AT HOME: O.O
GEORGE CLINTON: Naaaasty Bob. Doggy Dog. Atomic Dog. Naaaasty Bob.
ME: I think anything called Nasty Bob is something that would be produced by Benry, Brian Heidik, and C.C. Heidik.
BOB: You’re not going to see nasty Bob.
ME: Thank god!
CORINNE: You are an unemployed, uneducated leech on society. And the only thing I would vote to give you is a handful of anti-depressants so that no one else has to be subjected to your constant crying anymore and maybe if you got some you would seem a little more sincere when you are crying about your dead father. You don’t deserve the million.
SUGAR: F— you!
DR. DREW: You are hurting. Not helping, Corinne. You should know better. Maybe this hateful speech is a reflection of your issues with your own father. Would you like to come on my show next season?
YOU:I don’t get it.
YOU 2 SECONDS LATER AFTER YOU GOOGLE SUGAR AND DR. DREW: Oh, heh. I see its relevance.
JEFF: We need to invite this b—- back.
ME: So fierce <3.)
Ori Kohav, – Rocky (Who is the biggest kicker? It’s a simple question. STFU Cassandra. Nobody cares. My Boston accent managed to not come through during my entire question.)
Matt Pike, – Heidi Strobel (
HEIDI: By the way, do you think there is a person on the jury that is more deserving of your seat in the Final Two? Wait, both of you say Rob? Is there anybody else? Is that the only person?
HEIDI: Wait did someone say something? No? You sure? That cricket sounded like it said ‘heidi’. That cricket could have been one of you two. Just sayin.
JEFF: I think they covered it, Heidi.
JEFF: Jenna wins in the biggest landslide vote in Survivor’s history!
HEIDI: Everyone else on the jury voted for Jenna because, like, they were all deathly afraid of me in as to what I would do if they voted for Matt instead.)
Sam Belden, – Lisi Linares (How many zeroes are in a million, Dreamz? Aren’t I hilarious indirectly referencing that you are an idiot? The shoes you wore show me you were unprepared for this game, Cassandra. I don’t care if you and your shoes are here. Earl, I don’t like you either. Everyone can go DIAFF.)
Brandon Alexander, – Kathy Vavrick O’ Brien (“It’s soooooooo sad what you did to me, Rob. Amber, did you do anything all game? No? Then I’ll vote Rob because at least he stood up and admitted to doing the things he did. Sooooooo sad. And I wasn’t even intending to quote Ashanti lyrics.”)
Andrea Zabala, – Rupert Boneham (I don’t get it. Did he eat Courtney Yates when I turned away to get a glass of water? Who knows.)