Day 34 — Favourite Family Visit
Phillip Scherer, Matt Pike, Angie MacNeil, Jimmy Jt, Ian O’ Brien, Rosey Sigglekow, Francisco Grilo, Logan Saunders, Joey Pannullo, Brandon Alexander, Aaron Conn, Ryan Weiss, – Pearl Islands (The biggest lie ever crafted in the history of reality television. Tijuana’s friend doing a canonball was a humorous moment that people seem to overlook. Lil’s husband was in about as good of shape as Steve & Dave from The Amazing Race 4. Burton’s mom couldn’t be more naïve when she wrote down that Burton’s honesty would cost his game. Unfortunately, the reverse is true Burton’s mom. It’s funny to see old people jump off a diving board into the ocean several feet below in their nice clothes.)
Julie Bentz, Brenda Porter, Eamon Jawatin, Ricky Mentesh, Maxime Gauthier-LaFond, Nelson Escobar, – Tocantins (Taj broke Probst’s arm at the news of her husband coming to camp. Stephen, J.T., Erinn, and Debbie all had forgettable visits. Coach and his assistant coach had a stretching and ego stroking session that would make Rudy and B.B. cringe in their graves.)
Diogo Almeida, Bobby Harvey, Andrea Zabala, Sarah Casa, – Vanuatu (“MOVE FASTER, LAURIE! IF YOU DON’T WIN THIS CHALLENGE FOR ME, WE’RE GETTING A DIVORCE WHEN WE GET BACK! SORRY I DIDN’T WIN this challenge. Play along and the others will keep me around because they’ll feel sorry that the guy in the wife-beater is verbally abusing his wife.)
Anne Curtis, Mervin Sanding, Ben Nehls, – Gabon (Matty pulls a Matty moment by spontaneously making a Gabon-style engagement ring and proposes to his dog. . .oh wait, it was actually his girlfriend. When you say you miss your dog, food, then your girlfriend, the viewers at home re-think your priorities. Sugar spread the ashes of her dad in the lagoon.)
Brian Wildman, David Healy, Jason Bleau, – Nicaragua (
CHASE: I promise I’ll take you on reward if it’s a family visit, Fabio.
FABIO: Right on! Party out! It’s the pizza dude! I wear my sunglasses at night!
JEFF: Chase wins reward!
FABIO: Four twentyyyyyyy four twentyyyyyyyy.
JEFF: Who are you taking, Chase?
CHASE: Holly and Sash.
FABIO: WTF man?! I’ll go on an immunity run now.
Ori Kohav, Daniel Knowles, – Exile Island (A random zoom-in on Shane’s nipple. Oh, it says ‘Boston’ on it. What, his name is BOSTON POWERS?! Bahahahahahahahaha. His elementary school days must have sucked! Terry’s wife inserts herself into the game and imposes the only strategic thinking that Terry has been able to do in his 31 days. Unfortunately you can’t make up for 33 days worth of mistakes, Trish.)
Brett Watts, – Thailand (The only time where a contestant is excited for the family visit of SOMEBODY ELSE’s loved one. I’m looking at you Clay Jordan. Also, Jim Glover escaped a potential murder plot when he complied with his wife’s wishes to eat a bugs, scorpion, and a tarantula. He dodges bullets, baby!)
Clayton Spivey, – Borneo (Rudy will never look at Greg Buis the same way again. It is arguable that Greg’s sister’s tape may have been more damaging than C.C. Heidik. For some reason, I don’t think Greg really cares.)
Alex Jordan, – Heroes vs. Villains (Colby becomes the angriest he has ever been in any episode of Survivor thanks to his brother. Russell successfully talks about how he’ll get even with Parvati in his (now ex) wife’s presence. Jerri’s 15% more German sister comes along to visit and completes Jerri’s ten-year Survivor storyline. Sandra breaks down in tears about an uncle that we couldn’t care less about. Rupert’s wife doesn’t get mauled by Rupert this time. A reward that includes throwing coconuts into a geyser means a good time was had by all.)